Category: Morning Pages

8:43. Just woke up. Home.

Yesterday was fun. I met a few friends. This was after a while I met someone and I realized how much I love meeting people and spending time talking about work and life and all that. I mean the phone and the texts and all that is around and I can on it all the time. But there is something about meeting people f2f that virtual communication can’t really deliver.

So that.

Staying on the theme of virtual communication, I have been spending a lot of time on social media (twitter, Instagram, facebook and others) lately. All of it needs to stop. I have larger things to work on and not worry about validation from friends and strangers. Today on, I will use two phones – one for critical communication (calls, emails, WhatsApp) and the other for all frivolous ones (twitter, Instagram etc). Let’s see how that experiment goes.

In other news and a quick #note2self, yesterday, I met a guy that asked me about my work and made me realise that I probably suck as much because I dont make the effort to make phone calls. I have no problems to be honest to make these phone calls. Just that I am the kinds that respect other people’s times and do not bother them. And I expect exactly this from others when they speak with me. So, maybe I need to change this as I go along. In fact this is what the Everesrt Base Camp should have taught me. That life is so fragile, so unprdictable, so harsh that a mere phone call can’t really hurt!

Anyhow. More later. For the time being, here’s the journal for the day.

1. Emoticon: :|.
   Indiffernet. Not happy. Not sad. Not content. Thinking about money and life and all that.
2. Mindful Index (on a scale of 10): 2.
   I remain 2.
3. Things that I am grateful.
   1. I have friends that I can meet and be myself and have a great time meeting.
   2. I have the confidence to walk into a coffee store and use my time to get things done, rather than getting stuck in the traffic (when I get late)
   3. ?
4. Things that would make my today great
   1. I am to meet a senior from college. If that meeting converts into business, it would be great.
   2. If I can ship the quarterly letter, it would be great. I have written a large part of it yesterday.
5. A daily affirmation.
   I have all that I need to live happy and healthy.
6. Amazing things that happened yesterday?
   1. Met a friend from MDI. Realised that I am not touchy / feely / huggy with the closest of my friends.
   2. Interviewed some amazing people for The Podium. These kids that AD had found are among the best we’ve had in a long long time. I just hope they come on board and take us to greater heights.
7. What could have made yesterday better?
   1. If I could have had a cab, the day could have started better.
   2. I could not avoid eating kachra yesterday. I need to learn how to do that. I ended up eating nachos and peanuts and I dont know what else.
   3. One random person I was hoping to meet cancelled on me. I need to become someone that no one cancels on! Dunno how. But that.
8. Quote for the day
   From Will Smith. If you and I get on a theadmill together, there are two outcomes possible. Either you are getting off it before me. Or I am going to die on it. Here.

Moving on with the day. Here’s the streaks.

• OMAD – 0
• #book2 – 0
• NOFAP – 0
• #noCoke – 1
• #noCoffee – 0. Had 2 yesterday.
• #aPicADay – 2. Here.
• Daily Journal – 2
• Money spent – Did not track. Will start from today.
• Killer Boogie – 0
• 10K steps a day – 0
• Surya Namaskar – 0
• Daily Mail to #teamSG – 2
• 10 mins of meditation – 0
• Minimaslism Counter – -3 +1. I am retaining this from last time around.
• Morning Pages / Meditations – 3

6:38. Home. The only one I have ever known.

So I am in Delhi now. And I am back to work. I need to dive headfirst into work, even if Delhi doesn’t offer me the most conducive environment for work. In fact, I will try this week, and then on the basis of how it goes, I will decide if I want to stay here. Or move to some other place (even Mumbai, if that is required).

One large thing that I want to do is to be 32″ around my waist by end of the year. I will start working on it from today. Eat less. Eat at home. Eat mindfully. Fast once a week. The day I am gonna get the most crap in my system, would be the weekends. So, fast on the weekends.

That.

On to other things, there’s a lot open at my end. At work specifically. And for other things that I need to do for the home. And for random dreams that I like the idea of conjuring. I was hoping that the trip to EBC would give me some clarity about life and all that. None of that happened. To be honest, the daily grind of the walk was way too overwhelming to even apply my head to something else. I mean I did find time to scribble and think and all that but it wasn’t what I had imagined it to be. Easier would have been to throw the connectivity somewhere and then just stay with a notepad and a pencil. Maybe the next break I take would be exactly this. Let’s see when that happens. Where things stand right now, I have a lot to work on.

What else?

Not sure. Nothing strikes my head right now. I am yet to open my notes, email, Asana, Roam, etc, and figure out the things that need to be done. Plus, since I have just woken up after a 16-hour sleep, I am yet to come back to life. Even moving limbs is being a pain. Maybe it’s all the exhaustion of the walk of the last few days?

Guess this is about it. Time to get going and start working.

And, finally, starting streaks from today on. From ground-up. Here we go.

• OMAD – 0
• #book2 – 0
• #noCoke – 0. I had a lot of coke while I was on the trek. It stops today.
• #noCoffee – 0. Ditto. Lot of coffee. It stops today.
• #aPicADay – 0. Took a lot of pics but did not post those.
• Money spent – 0. Literallty stopped tracking money. Need to track.
• Killer Boogie – 0. I may start with this, now that I have nothing else to work on for my fitness.
• 10K steps a day – 0
• Surya Namaskar – 0. Will get to this.
• 10 mins of meditation – 0. Will get to this.
• Minimaslism Counter – -3 +1. I am retaining this from last time around.
• Morning Pages / Meditations – 1. Today is post 1.
• NOFAP – Did a sreak of more than a month. Let’s see what I decide on this over the next few days.

7:45. Breakfast table at the hotel.

Quite honestly, I love hotels. Even this one – for all the problems and shittiness and issues that it has. In fact, I would love to live in a hotel. You know, those serviced apartments? Those. Plus I anyway dont really care about possessions, gifts, personal things as long as I have a large, comfortable bed to sleep in and an AC that works well. And a service that comes and cleans the place in my absence. Someone I know lives in a service apartment at a fancy hotel in Dubai and I am jealous of him. Wait. Not jealous. Inspired. After all, the guy has worked hard to make that happen. Let’s see when I get to make that happen.

For the time being, the highlight of the day has to be that I am back to work from today. Even though I am in Nepal till tomorrow. Plus, a lot has happened in my absence. Most of it is not pleasant. I will have to take some hard calls about life and work and career and relationships and all that. The next few days would be interesting, to say the least. I must say that I quite like it here. People are nice. It has a small-town vibe and yet places that offer comfort and convenience. I think if I can manage to find remote work, I would not mind living and working out of Nepal. Of course, Goa as an option is open to working out of! It all probably depends on the kind of work I can find for myself. So that.

Oh, yesterday was fun. We went out to this club (Purple Haze, Kathmandu) where a live band was playing. The acoustics were fucked up (Killa would have lost his shit) but I loved the vibe. It was exactly the kind of place that I would love to own and run and manage. High ceilings, interesting decor, great service (something that I have found consistent at Nepal), and top of it all, managed well. I saw the band and I had to had to had to dream of owning a place like that. If not for anything specific, just for the opportunities that it provides. In fact, I took a note as well while I was there. Where most people see entertainment, relaxation, chilling out, etc, I see opportunity. I just need to be able to capitalize on those. Come on, universe. Come on, Mr. G.

What else?
I am not sure what else to write.
Oh, once I am back in India, I plan to go on a disciplined diet of low-carb food, in an attempt to get fitter. I have promised a couple of people that I would be 32″ by the time 2021 ends. I am at 37 and a half right now. In fact, I had thought I would lose weight while on the trek but nothing of that sort has happened. I’ve actually put on more weight for all the Dal Rice that I ate while I was there.

I think this is about it for the time being. I mean there’s a lot to be written and thought and all that but I am still not there when it comes to writing. This break of 15 days was way too long and the writing muscle seems to have waned off. They say it right. Muscles atrophy if you dont practice things every day. May be in the next few days the words would flow better and things would make more sense.

Till then, over and out. More tomorrow.

PS: No streaks today either.
PPS: I need to find a way to get these morning pages to become more than just a journal of sorts. Maybe I will start writing the next book. Maybe I will work on the script. Maybe I will bring back SoG here. But something has to happen with these pages to make em more useful. Ideas anyone?

8:30. Home. This could be the last post before I leave for my trip. And I dont know when I will pick back the baton after I am back. I dont have any deep or meaningful or insightful or “famous last words” kind of a thing to leave this text with.

Yesterday was a little weird. I did some work. I did some time pass. I had stayed the previous night at a nice hotel. I was in that space where things looked rosy. But then moment I reached home, the grind of the 2-hour travel from Gurgaon to home literally killed me. Plus as soon I was back, I had to take an RTPCR test for travel. This is my second test and like last time around, it was very uncomfortable. Blame it on my deviated septum. And then I was in this zone where I was unable to work. Yeah, I am that fragile. And then I had an argument of sorts with a colleague. That was not cool either. But guess that’s ok. Part and parcel of life.

Today is more or less gonna get spent on working. I do have to buy a few last-minute things. Will step out and get those. I also need to pack things. There’s less than a day to go for the trip. So that.

I am hoping I would be able to write tomorrow as well. Let’s see.

Oh, this feels like such an anti-climax moment – ending a 280-day streak with a dud post. But guess that’s how life is. No clear closures.

• OMAD – 0
• #book2 – 0
• #noCoke – 189
• #noCoffee – 33
• #aPicADay – 0
• Money spent – 10277
• Killer Boogie – 0
• 10K steps a day – 0
• Surya Namaskar – 0
• 10 mins of meditation – 0
• Minimaslism Counter – -3 +1
• Morning Pages / Meditations – 279
• NOFAP – 15