120121 – Morning Pages

I talk about the two kinds of people – the one that want to stay with their families and the ones that leave the safe havens behind.

7:51 AM
This one would be short, I have to be somewhere. I have till 8:30 to write this.

I slept fitfully (guess that’s cos all the coffee I had?) but I did have a dream. That I can remember. Been a while since I had one of those. About Lucky Ali. And Rabbi Shergill. Both rolled into one artist. I somehow track this hybrid artist down and get to spend time with him and talk to him about all his friends from the past. It’s funny that I created an artist that’s the combination of these two. In that chat, this new artist mentioned KJ Paji, Vishal Bhardwaj, and another one that’s lost forever. Funny are the ways of life!

So, apart from this, yesterday was an eventful day. Among the most exciting things to have happened is that I found some money on a random hill near Baga. This is the second time this year that I have found money on the road. Like the one I spotted on the 1st of this year, even this one was uncanny. I was on a random hill, in almost pitch-dark (save for the glow from a mobile phone). Are these the signs of the tide turning? I even got a call from a placement consultant about a potential role. Again, something that hasn’t happened in a while! Yay!

Of course, I fucked my system by eating Maggi, Fried Rice, Ajinomoto (:D), and our old nemesis, Diet Coke. I have to say, I love eating. Thing is, I love eating things that I love anyway. I am not much for experimenting with food. If I were the kinds to have a great metabolism, I would love to eat Dal Makhani every day. I’ll probably eat Maggi often. I love the crisps like a man possessed. But then, all these are foods that are “rich” in complex carbs and oils and I don’t know what all. Need to stop with these.

The other thing that I did yesterday and I have to talk about this evening I spent with some locals. Well, local not as in someone from Goa but someone who’s been working here for over 5 years. The dude has been around and had his family back home.

So he took me to this rock beyond Baga that most people just ignore. It’s a 5-minute hike from the hustle and bustle and once you are there, all you see is darkness all around you. Except for this restaurant (called Tulum, is romantic af) on a rock, in the middle of nowhere, and the Baga-Calangute-Candolim shoreline (the way you’d see from a boat in the sea). Neither the photos nor the words I use would do justice to the sight I had access to. I am recommending the spot to everyone I know for when they come to Baga. Some may romanticize the idea, some may balk at the trek but it is worth a visit. It is THE IDEAL example of a place that I had ever imagined in my head. In an earshot to civilization. Secluded. Offers a bird’s eye view. You know the kinds you get from a high-rise? This is just high-far from the shore. I’d love to make it my home if I could!

Tulum, Baga
Baga Calngute Shoerline

The thing that I want to think out loud about is that when I spoke to this person, the “local” from Goa, he talked about how life in Goa is good and not good at the same time. From the perspective of someone who works here. He talked about how he’s the only one from his family that has to miss his family functions. When the entire world is partying (around Diwali, New Year, Summer Vacations etc), he’s hard at work. He then took me to a place where the locals eat (cheap food, BYOB etc) and there we had few waiters that were from North-East. Again, hardworking boys. Quick on their feet. Good service. But inherent sadness in how they moved. The owner of the place seemed like a kind man but guess the sadness is of being away from their loved ones.

I think the world has two kinds of people.

One, where family, neighbors, friends, community, etc become everything that they stand for. They are content with less. When I say less I do not want to undermine their work or achievement. I am merely suggesting that they would put their family and relatives over anything material. And there’s nothing wrong with the choice they are making. Their life. Their choice. But at least till the time they are alive, they get to give peace, comfort, happiness to the ones around them. They become the rock of their structures and they add to the fabric of their cultures and societies.

And the second, like me, where the family is important, relationships are important but more important is the dent we make. And for that, we are willing to leave behind everything. Some of us get to make the dent and go down the history books. Some of us don’t and die in anonymity. But most times what we do impact a larger number of people than the type one. Again, I am not glorifying people like me. I am merely postulating.

Look at Elon. Bill. Steve. Jeff. They probably left their families for a long-time to be able to do what they’ve done.

Of course, the best option is to be able to do both one and two. And the odds of that happening is rare and takes a while before that happens. Except for some freak incidents where you are lucky and you find a vocation while you are with your family. For the large part, you need to assume that you will have to make a choice. And once you do that, you better stick to it.

So, it is imperative for us to understand who we are and what side are we on. Once that clarity happens in the head, I think things fall in place and life seems to start making sense. In my case, I know what side I am on. What side are you on?

And that I think is the message, note of the day. What do you think?

Oh, no #freewriting for #book2 today. Not right now at least. May be during the day. If that, I will add to this post. And if not, see you guys tom!

010121 – Morning Pages

The first post of 2021. I marvel at all the partygoers and I realise my own limitation as a human being. Plus random tidbits.

010121 – Happy new year!

A new post. I have been big on these new beginnings since I can remember. This one, #in2021, is no different. While I get depressed on my birthdays, I am excited like a child for the new year. I see an opportunity for a fresh start. I make elaborate lists of things that I’d do in the new year. For #in2021, I am yet to publish the list but I have been on it for a few days now. Let’s see when I get to publish it.

So, last night I was walking down probably the busiest street in Goa and I was surprised, shocked, and appalled at what I saw. The road was choc-a-block with cars, two-wheelers, pedestrians, and other revelers and merrymakers. There were hardly any masks and there was definitely no social distancing. No one was worried about COVID-19. As if it did not exist. There were parents with young kids that were ok to move around in the crowded markets. Heck, they seemed to be enjoying. I spotted a couple asking for recommendations where they could party with their 3-year old. Groups of friends were willing to hug strangers and share drinks. Businesses were trying to get people to stuff in like this was the last time they’d ever make money.

It was sad and pathetic.

It’s like people want to die! They do not care about their lives, or of others. I saw so many people so drunk out of their wits that they could not stand straight. This one girl literally tipped over the fence, onto the sidewalk. I am not sure what’s this excitement about getting drunk just because the calendar is advancing by one. I have someone close that is big on these parties. When I asked her, she said, “just”. I don’t know what this just means. Maybe I will learn in a few years?

I mean, you may argue that my excitement over these new-year resolutions and checklists is as irrational as what I am claiming the new-year celebration to be. May be. To each their own!

So, may be it’s wrong of me to judge em. It’s their life and they can do whatever they think is right for them. That’s the thing. I think I know all the answers and I am this gift to mankind that has the responsibility of fixing everyone and everything broken. I often get into trouble for offering unsolicited advice. And I have always been ok with the trouble. I feel as if I am making a difference, even if they are not ready. After all, the truth is bitter and a tough pill to swallow.

May be I need to swallow the pill that people are different and could have different motivations and preferences and lives than you.

So that.

Anyhow.

What I know for sure is that the madness in Goa will get over by the 4th and the world will be back to places they belong. And then it would take another 15 days to figure the aftereffects (COVID primarily) of all these people that descended on Goa from all parts of the country. And by then we would be back to regular programming. And that means life would start looking normal again. Normal = new normal.

So, as I write this, I am at the Royal Enfield Garage Cafe at Baga. I love the location and the ambience. If I ever make an office, it would be on these lines. And since its the pandemic year, there are hardly any people here, except when people are partying. I am sipping on to a lemonade (I hate the citrus-y taste but am trying to get healthy, like each year. lol!) and after I’ve had half a glass of it, I spotted this dead body of the tiny bug in the glass. And I have continued to sip onto it. That’s the thing. Since I’ve come to Goa, I have become indifferent to this dance of life. Earlier, I was super finicky about these insects and all. Oh, I have also started to get comfortable with dogs all over again. I think when in Goa, you can’t avoid running into them and most of them are far friendlier than the ones I have encountered elsewhere. So that’s a big change for me!

Oh, the other thing that I need to write is that this one took as much effort as the one I wrote yesterday. The one yesterday was for the want of will, this one was made tough as there was no electric current.

But then, somehow, made it happen. I feel like god ūüėČ

With that, over and out!