090221 – Morning Pages

An unedited quickie on how I am doing, what I am thinking and where I am going.

9:59. This is not the first thing. I had thought I would write this from a cafe where I have my aaloo puff from. I knew that it opened at 9. And I was there by 9:01. But that was shut. One of the staff members waiting outside told me that they’d open at 10 today. Why? Just like that. Then I thought I would go to the CCD and write from there. Google says it opens at 9. But no, even by 9:30, even the shutter was down. Lol. And then I started to look for places that I could go to and write from. And I found none. I mean there were a few places that I could sit and eat. But I couldn’t write from there. That’s Goa. Not been designed for working. But then, no complaints. Such are things. Such is life.

So, coming to morning pages. I’ve realized that I take almost 2 hours every day to write this. Which is ok. As long as I have something to say or something to write. But with Podium getting more serious, I need to start getting serious about time. So, hereon, I will wrap these morning pages in 30 minutes. Including the part, I write for book2. I know I wouldn’t be able to get in much but such is life. Need to balance work (lol), reputation (podium), and hobbies (writing and morning pages).

It’s 10:20. I started this at 9:59. So I have another 9 minutes. Let’s see what happens in the next 9. Lol, I hate this self-imposed random pressure.

Ok. Lemme think about what I want to write about. Yeah, the Goa Miles thingy. The other day, some local taxi guys beat up some drivers that are on Goa Miles. For the uninitiated, Goa is probably the only place in India where Uber or Ola is not allowed. Because the local taxi mafia is so strong and influential that it has kept tourists harassed. To find a solution (thank God to whoever it was), they came up with Goa Miles, an app-based taxi service (like Uber and Ola). It works like a dream (but can be unreliable) and makes the drivers a tad more accountable. The local taxi guys refuse to be on the app. People like me that respect respect (not a repetition) and reliability more than money have moved to Goa Miles and in-process denting the business of local taxi guys. To a point that they are now angry. Lemme park this here.

I also met this DOP yesterday that has setup Goa Talkies. He had similar stories to share. Locals wanting “outsiders” to not work hard and in process make the locals more accountable and hardworking.

I have seen the same thing play out in Mumbai as well. Leave alone Mumbai, even in various pincodes, if someone from “‘outside” comes and does some work, everyone comes up in arms. I dont know why people dont see that in the long-term they are fucking things for themselves and their ilk? I mean you will probably be dead by the time repercussions start hitting you but what about your offsprings?

Because of these two, I am actually reconsidering my move to Goa. I cant think anything short term and if in the long-run, I am at the mercy of mafia, I’d rather be elsewhere. I dont have the bone in me to fight things out. I am often taken for a ride (remember that podcast snafu?) but I let it pass. I believe life’s way too long to get attached to things.

I think this detachment is what gives me the power to do a lot more things than what I think I can. And this also takes away the power to get emotionally invested in things and deliver. Sigh. Why arent there any easy answers?

So, the other thing that dawned onto me is that these morning pages are making me an introvert. What this means is that everything that is on my head and I want to talk about, I just dump them here and when I talk to friends, I have nothing to talk about. And since I dont consume popular culture at all, I dont know what to talk to them. Neither am I educated / opinionated etc etc. So I dont know what to talk to people about. And I have realised since I dont have anything to talk to them, they stay away from me. Sigh!

In other news, I am going to Mumbai tomorrow. I hope to be back on the 20th. In the week I am in Mumbai, I hope I get to meet friends. I also plan to dispose off a lot of things. Need to get lighter. Including books. Even if I haven’t read those. Wait. No, not books. I may get them to the library I want to create at Goa (among other things). If I create it! Oh, I am taking a train. I may rationalize it by saying a million things but I wanted to save money. A flight is 3X expensive. And the 10 hours that I will be enclosed in the metal box for, I’ll probably get some things done. Let’s see how the journey goes.

Finally, I have finally moved to the M1 as my primary computer. And thanks to the cloud, am cool with data and all. I have two issues though. A, since this is a shiny new machine, I hate it when I see a speck of dust on it. But then for someone who’s a road warrior like me, dust is part and parcel of life. And B, nothing seems to tether to it! No hotspots, no Bluetooth headphones. I don’t know what’s wrong. I’ll see if that’s a universal thing with M1 or it’s just me.

Chalo, with that, its over and out. And it’s 10:45. Lol!

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