0711. Woke up about 3 minutes ago. Eyes can’t even focus as I type this! Was up till 2:30. Had some work and thanks to McD, I had a place to sit and work out of. Of course, there was no Internet but that’s ok. I managed. So when I was coming back from McD (and a subsequent meeting with a friend) at 2 something, I realized I love roads at night. I have said this multiple times in the past but yesterday it was like written on a well-lit hoarding in big bold fonts. Must do something about that! Thing is, when in Mumbai, while I often thought about it, I couldn’t think too much about it. Life was always rushing around me. Or if it wasn’t, I was rushing around. There was no opportunity to take a pause, take a break and soak the scenery in. Here, the entire scenery is a break. And why would it not be? There is hardly any phone connections. Or internet availability ;P No no, digs apart, there is some charm in living in a small city.

Oh, Goa is reporting fantastic weather and thinning crowds. In case you want to make a trip, this is the time.

Moving on. Yesterday was a big day for the world we live in. Jeff Bezos decided to step down from running Amazon on a day to day basis. Wow! End of an era. I can’t wait for people to write (and me to read) as those pieces will start to trickle in. After Steve Jobs, Jeff has been a constant source of content, inspiration, awe, fear, respect, etc. Let’s see what reports come in.

The other big thing that happened yesterday was Rihanna (the American pop-star who I just know for this track with Eminem) spoke about the ongoing Farmer’s protest. It sucks and it’s our collective shame that the world is seeing what has become of India. Hopefully, that’d put some pressure on the government here. Maybe some sense would prevail and actions would be unturned. I hope our Indian “stars” grow some balls as well and do more than just welcoming the next Kapoor on insta.

So, I was to decide by EOD yesterday about where I wanted to live. And no, I haven’t been able to decide. I even ran a blind poll to see what “destiny” told me. Option 1 was Mumbai and 2 was Goa. Lol. The thing is, I’d love to be in Goa long-term but I can’t seem to figure out my work situation. It just sucks that life is dictated by what you’d work on. Whereas it should be the other way around.

I will give myself another day today to figure out things. I know I know, I have been delaying for no reason. But I can’t help it. I just can’t seem to think on this. Do I just toss a coin and figure what destiny has in store for me? Do I continue to drift and let life dictate terms? Arrrghh… such helplessness ๐Ÿ™

Oh, I do have a radical idea that I have been thinking for a while. And yesterday on one of our calls Akshay pointed out as well. How about I sell shares in myself? You know, I am the “company” that people put money in (like they invest in stocks) and I promise a certain dividend each year (depending on my income of that year) and like other stocks, they can sell these shares.

While this sounds like an interesting idea, I am not sure if it’s workable. There are some inherent issues with this. To start with, this would be a super risky asset class (may be more volatile than BTC) but could also deliver better ROI than anything else. There is a big big risk of investment going to zero (what if I die?). Then there is performance risk (what’s the guarantee that I would make enough to fund all my side projects and yet return this money?). Plus the biggest of them all. If someone gave me a crore today, I wouldn’t know what to do with it! I mean there’s no singular idea that I have that can take all my energy and that allows me to scale things! I know that I’d never run away with anyone’s money. Or trust. I know that I’d be honest. But I don’t know when would I start to give out dividends. So that. I remember, in one of SoG’s I asked my readers if they’d support me by paying just 100 bucks, and not one person (except some comment from JKB) replied. And here I am, hoping to sell shares. Lol. Wishful thinking!

Anyhow, on with the day. I’ve been eating crap last few days. I’d try to gun for a 48-hour fast, starting now. So, the next meal is Friday morning. Let’s see how it goes. Maybe i’ll not eat till the time I know where I want to be. Wait. What about I spend a few days in Mumbai (I need to be there anyway on the 14th to meet Shravan, and on the 16th to attend Rajesh’s wedding) and see if I can create more work opportunities for myself! May be. Let’s see.

Oh, I have to note that I got rejected from a place that I had applied to. Which is ok. Not that I expected to get thru, it was out of my league. Probably need to start documenting all these rejections!

That’ about it I guess. Oh, I have a large project to work on today. I have decided that I need to be out there. I will start putting my face, at least on video (if not on photos). And to help me get going, AA has asked me to make 5 videos of 10 mins each by EoD today. Each video has to be of specific interest to people. So let’s see what I cook up. I will share links, if I get around to do it.

Apart from this have a few other things lined up. One of them is to activate this WA group (broadcast only) where I plan to share tips on better writing. Let’s see how that goes. In case you wish to join it, here.

Guess this is it. Time for #freewriting on #book2.

“We did not have these computers and phones and other fancy devices back then. We had to rely on our instincts. If we had to find information, we had to manipulate a gullible farmer and ask him about the temple. Then we’d stake it out for days. Unlike now, we did not have hotels per se. We had dharamshalas, serais and even them temples themselves. It was very normal to use these temples as resting places while you were on a journey. There was always a roof on your head and there was always food. There’s nothing else a traveler needed. And oh boy, did we use those temples.” Raunak let out a hearty laugh.

Chintan was more than intrigued. He was hooked. He thought he was the storyteller. Here was Raunak, who had better and grander stories than Chintan could ever imagine. He had to get more from him. Maybe Raunak did hold the key to Chintan’s magnum opus. He egged on, “Incredible! For someone like you who doesn’t speak at all, how did you manage all these conversations…”

Raunak broke him mid-sentence and said, “How do you think I am managing mine with you?”

Chintan could only nod and smile at himself. He knew he had found the guru, the moral compass that he was seeking all this while. He knew Raunak was going to be an important character in his story. The story of his life. And the story that he’s been chasing from all the way to Goa from his home in Uttarakhand!

***

That’s about it.

Few words.

But this is all I have time for today. A lot to be done.

See you guys on the other side.

2 thoughts on “030221 – Morning Pages

  1. Am intrigued by your frustration about life and work being discrete choices. The choices you have made so far do not really corroborate that. Or do they?

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