Thanks to a sleep tracker, I realise that I probably need to fix my relationship status. Read on.
I recently got myself a Whoop. It has been telling me that I sleep about 5 hours and thus I need more. Last night I decided that the world be damned, I will sleep at 10. And I woke up at 6ish. So a solid 8 hours. As per it, I slept for 7 hours and 39 minutes (compared to about an average of 5-6 hours).
See this chart…
Now, logic says I should’ve woke up fresh, ready to take on the world and conquer it all.
But no, I feel the same like I do on most days. Groggy. Slowly. I can feel various parts of the body start cranking and come to life. I can feel various parts of the body complain about various kinds of pain and moan with various kinds of discomfort.
I want to justify that my body has been scarred in various battles over the years but clearly, that is not the case. It’s at best scarred with all the food I’ve gobbled over the years while shaping the couches and beds around houses that I’ve lived at.
I dont feel any more refreshed, any more rested, any more changed that I do on other days. In fact, something different happened. I woke up with the feeling that I should’ve woken* up next to someone.
And I need to address this feeling. For numerous reasons.
One, I haven’t felt like this in a while.
My last stable, serious, relationship was a couple of months before COVID put us in a lockdown. 4 years ago**. And over the last four years, I’ve got used to having the entire bed by myself. I can’t recall when was the last time in the last four years when I felt like waking up next to someone. So this is new.
Two, I had always imagined that I am the kind that would be a lone nut. My eccentricity and life choices would make me an unsuitable man for anyone sane. The odds of finding someone who’ll accept my shenanigans is like zero. And all my life I have trained myself to operate as a one-person army. I mean I neither feel the need for having someone around me and if I do feel that on rare days (like today), I quickly remind myself that all modern relationships are built on the bedrock of convenience and comfort and capital and these things are often easy to screw up. In my case, I saw one of my serious relationships go south because I didn’t have money. So, when I feel the need to wake up next to someone, this means that I am not fully trained and I need to do more work in my head.
Three, lately, I’ve been flirting rather seriously with a friend. The kinds where am actually thinking about what to text her and how to make her smile. The kinds where I anticipate her replies and make decision trees in my head on how the conversation would flow. And no, I haven’t done that in a while. Thus, maybe all those conversations and thoughts about being with someone have switched on those neurons and receptors that signal affection. And this need to have someone on the right side of the bed could be an outcome of that.
This third one is easy to solve, to be honest. I know that these conversations are temporary and the road leads to a dead end. I am way too invested in her life and I know that my eccentricity (see point 2) would lead to jeopardy.
Four, I am used to living a certain way and doing things in a certain manner. These things may count as eccentric (again point 2) but these could also be dismissed as negotiable behaviours. For example, I dont want a kitchen in my home. I want AC at 22. I want music playing all the time in the house. While a potential occupant of the right side of the bed may dismiss these as “cute” behaviour, over time, these start to become points of contention and then a pillow magically appears between the line of control on the bed. And then it’s all downhill from thereon.
So that.
I am sure there are more reasons. But I do have this feeling and I need to find a solution. And I dont know how to solve it.
I will see if the feeling persists and lingers on. If it does, I will find a way to solve it. If it doesn’t, I can continue to use the right side of the bed to store my laptop, iPad, phone, book and all that.
Time shall tell.
With this, over and out. Thanks for reading my bedtime and bedside stories.
*Repeat. Woken up next to. Not slept with. ** I have had a few conversations where I thought they would evolve into relationships but they did not.
TW: I talk about dark days of my life as an entrepreneur. I talk about things that may be construed as triggering, depressing and of mental health challenges. PLEAES PLEASE PLEASE do not read if these things affect you.
.
..
…
….
…..
…..
Here’s a secret. If you want to derail me and my life, all you need to do is talk to me in an impolite, rude or condescending tone.
Let’s park this. I will come back to this.
Now, another secret. More like a confession really. The last few days at work haven’t been the best. Dont think people who work with me or know me apart from work would’ve spotted it. Or may be they would’ve. I don’t know. The point is, all I do is work. My life starts and ends with work. I wake up, work, eat, work, nowadays try to catch the sunset (see this reel that I posted today), work, sleep and repeat.
What I do may not be meaningful in the grand scheme of things but it gives meaning to my life. It probably helps anchor the lives of a few other people as well (but I am not sure). So when I don’t have great days, it affects me and my raison d être and I don’t know what to do about it. Most people have a family to go back to. I have a Rubik’s Cube. That too I crammed the solution to and I have since forgotten. So, all I end up doing is closeting my emotions on my echochamber (on my Roam) or writing cryptic posts on my blog (or twitter) or eating crap (Dal Makhani mmmm).
This time, today, I choose to do none of these. I am going to put it out. On my blog. Here. After all, I chose to live in public and live more authentic this year.
So that.
Now, why’s that I haven’t had great days at work? Simple. Go back to the line I opened this piece with. “…talk to me in an impolite, rude or condescending tone.”
In the last week, almost EACH of my clients has spoken to me (or my team) in a tone that’s not the best or polite. And today yesterday, a friend who’s also a client spoke to me like never before. That was probably the last straw that made me think this much and all.
Of course, he can’t be wrong, he’s almost never wrong. He knows more than me and all that. And as a result, things in my head have spiralled down an abyss. You know, like Alice fell down that Rabbit hole?
And I know that I am not bouncing back to my A game anytime soon. I take time. Of course, I will fake it and the world will continue to see me functioning as I do on other days – reliable, high-functioning, in a hurry, high on energy, dreamy-eyed, lost and other such things. As I write this, its 8:30 AM, I am at a Starbucks 20 KMs away from home, sitting on a table facing the wall with my back as straight as I can stretch to. Someone looking at me would see a old man going at it!
To be able to find my groove, I would need to find peace over the next few days. Not inner. Am ok on that front. But the outer one. Like you know, get my space. Since the last relationship went sour, I’ve become this loner who likes to have his space and his freedom.
So, I don’t know how I’d find my outer peace.
I would also want to get a closure on the reason for this. I mean would could’ve gone so wrong at so many places that we have so much trass from all sides? I am unable to understand why do these people, all from different industries, and different parts of the country chose to speak with us like that. Nothing is broken at any of these clients. We may not deliver award-winning work but we are reliable as fuck. Plus, we at C4E work really hard to ensure that we deliver more value than what we promise, often at our cost. You know, underpromise and overdeliver. To each of my clients.
And this has been hardwired in the heads and hearts of each person that agrees to work with C4E. That we would overdeliver come what may. Money is never important. We could lose money on projects (I’ve often done that). I would beg, borrow, and steal to keep the kitchen going. I’ve done that in the past. I would do it again if I had to. I’ve kept my team lean. I dont pay them as much as I want to. All to preserve sanity and not go beyond our aukaat (while taking shots beyond that).
Wait. Before I digress. So, the funny part is, ALL our clients know this. Each of them. And they see it. And yet they tend to talk to us in a tone unwelcome, uncalled for and unneeded. I know they dont know that am soy and snowflake and easily hurt and their simple act of trying to push me to do more would derail me. I think I am still ok but I can’t imagine how my team feels!
But then, why be impolite? Why be condescending? Why be rude?
Maybe, a large part of this sadness and disappointment is my expectation from life and people itself. Maybe I am too simplistic (and wrong) in believing that people don’t have egos. Maybe people at the core are bitchy and mean for no reason. Maybe people love playing power games. Maybe people like to just poke with harmony and see what comes out of it. What if Joker was right all this while? PS: Even if they are wired differently, I will continue to chart my path. If I had to go live in a village where costs are low, I would. I would retire in Goa or in the hills where at least I can breathe free!
The other part could be that my approach to life could be unsettling for the world at large and they can’t understand it. I am trying to build a utopian world where everyone is kind to each other, everyone is engaged, everyone is chasing meaning (and not vanity goals), everyone sees magical possibilities. Where its one for all and all for one. Where I exist because we exist. But maybe everyone is hardwired into creating kalesh for kalesh’s sake? PS: Dont think this is the case though. I know people are really really good. I really believe that people do create magic.
I’ve been thinking about this for the last few days now and I am at my wit’s end. So, I kinda give up on trying to find the reason or answer. All I know is that I will chase my utopia till I can.
Truth be told, I am often flexible on morals. I like the idea of doing whatever it takes to build a life I want to live. No, I am not talking about doing illegal things. But I am ok to bend a few rules if I have to. As long as I am not taking away from someone more deserving. I sometimes feel I were a tad evil – I would’ve done so much better! If I could sell my soul, I would probably be rich enough already to pay myself well and pay my people well. But then I get back to my thought about trying to build a long-term, sustainable, boring business that everyone tapdances to work on an everyday basis.
The other part is these lingering thoughts about the challenges of running a service business in the market that we are in. We work hard to make other people’s dreams come true and in exchange, we get to make just enough to be happy about. Some days we make more than what we need but most days we merely get by. Luckily we are at a good place – on any given day, most of our clients are great companies, folks and all. They pay us ok money. We are challenged enough. All is well. But then when there are days like the last few and especially yesterday, I start questioning what we do.
The last bit is, maybe this is the trigger to push harder on my attempts to build a business that does not rely on just a few people or companies. Maybe build something that has hundreds of customers spread across geographies. Maybe I need to rethink how I work and slowly move on to a product business or something. I don’t know yet. My head’s in a soup. You can see. Lol.
Anyhow. Long rant is over. The point is, when someone speaks to me in a tone or a manner that is not kind or polite, in my head, all hell breaks loose. I spiral down and this is where I am at right now.
Of course, I will be back. I am strong like that. Vanita calls me a survivor. I survived COVID-19. I survived people cheating on me. I have survived so far. And I shall. Maybe i’d get a tee that says, “I am a survivor” :D. Lol!
Ok, more later. Thanks for reading (if you did). And yes, all is well. My back is still straight. I am still surrounded by a team that will move the mountains for me and for our clients. And we would continue to give our heart, head and soul for the work we do.
Oh, if you are reading this and you want to hire a great team to work with you – look us up 🙂
When you open WordPress editor to start writing, they share a prompt – what’s on your mind.
I think I needed this trigger.
So, what’s on my mind?
One-line answer – A lot!
Lemme elaborate. Like most times, I will make a list. Here are the things that I am thinking about and these are making me anxious and unhappy and all that. And yes, these are in an order – these came to my head as I started to think about things!
What if the run that I am on doesn’t continue in the next year? For context, in this year I have scaled C4E (revenue, profits, clients, people) at least 2X compared to last year. While our base is extremely small (we are still a Micro enterprise as per GoI definitions) but to me, it is big.
So what if this dream run doesn’t continue?
Ok, I am not the one to affect me, normally. I believe this too shall pass. I know we are in a good place. We have a good mix of long-term clients and short-term projects. Team is stable, engaged, passionate and active. And while they are atamnirbhar, as the oldest member of the team, I feel responsible for them. And that’s the challenge. What if I am unable to pay for them?
How do I scale? Now that I have seen a good year, the ambitious man in me seems to have started to stir. And this means I need to do more and at scale. And this means I need to work harder. Just that I don’t know which direction to work hard in! I mean we offer communication services to people and there are a million other companies that do this. And they do it cheaper and better. Why would the client choose me? Why would I use my time to build this? Did I learn all I learnt to just offer communication services? No, I don’t mean to be disrespectful. Different people have different battles and a communication agency is not mine. Not at this time at least. Maybe in the future. Never say never. So, coming back to the scale question, I need to work on that. And that is what keeps me up at night.
The chase of cool things. If you know me at all, you would know that I love shiny toys more than anything else. I’d rather spend my life in chase and not in actual deep, building of things. My joy is in zero to 1 and not in 1 to 100. This is something that Aditya Sir made me realize long ago! And the world we live in has a million shiny things to be honest and I have access to none of those. So, I am mindfucked about not having access to those cool things. I know that there’s no end to this. And I know better to not make that a pain point!
How do I build distribution? I’ve realized that everything in life boils down to one thing and one thing only – distribution. Once you have that, you can touch the sky and reach the moon and all that. Today I have pathetic distribution and reach. I may have 1000 followers on twitter but I don’t have an impactful reach and I need to build that. When I say impactful, I mean I should be able to reach people that matter. And they must know who I am.
On the internet, people agree that there are a few ways to reach there –
a, create polarizing content in polarizing categories (religion, celebrity, sports),
b, showcase your talent as a person of talent (humor, acting, opinions, wit etc),
c, identify a niche for yourself and create consistently on that, and finally,
d, spend money!
Now, I don’t have any of these 4. Plus I refuse to be siloed into one category – I am a free bird (lol). And thus the mindfuck.
How do I ship more things? The other question I keep asking is, how do I ship more. I agree that all the things that I have mentioned above need a tiny element of luck but this one, the one on shipping, is pure hard work. No luck. Once I ship, things may not work out or things may bomb or things may be substandard quality. But I know that shipping is single-handedly a thing that I can control! So that.
Maybe once I start shipping things, I will feel good? After all it’s been AGES since I’ve shipped something by myself!
So that!
Oh and thanks to this brain dump, now I know that since shipping contributes this much to my happiness, I need to probably amp up my shipping game!
And Obonato became the word of 2023 for me. And for some of us at C4E. Pooja introduced us to the word and it purportedly means “I exist because we exist”.
2023 was a testament to that.
I had a great 2023 because of “we”. We here is an entire village of people who have cared for me, worked with me, trusted me, given me work, allowed me to be me, hosted me, tolerated and even did not like me as much as I would want them to!
I will come to the review and lessons from 2023 shortly but right at the top, allow me to talk about the word for 2024. It’s “ruthless consistency”. Inspired by AK. I’ve realized that if I have to do more with my life and make the lives of those around me stronger, better, happier, sustainable and all that – I need to be consistent. And that is what I would chase. We’d get to this shortly. For the time being, let’s get started with a report card for 2023.
Recap of 2023
I will divide this into the following categories – C4E, SoG, SG, and Lessons.
On C4E
I’ll start with people. Not revenue. And I will end with the direction I want C4E to take in the years to come.
People. We are now almost 15 people strong. This time last year we were 7. We continue to remain a unique business – there are no full-time “employees” and yet most people are married to C4E. We are all partners in the village!
And like in a village, each of us loves each other, respects each other and supports each other. This has to be my biggest win of 2023.
In the words of one of our former clients and ongoing friends, like their company (CynLr), “We are a platform for opportunity exchange”. Each person at C4E has the opportunity to do more and think more and meet more people and chase their respective bliss and choose their own adventure.
In 2023, we paid at least 30 people EACH month – a fee ranging from 5K to 200K. 5 to interns (we don’t have any unpaid interns) and 200K to one of the partners (most people at C4E are partners). And no, I am not the highest-paid partner at C4E. And this does not include the manifold that we paid to our suppliers.
All this while, the focus has remained on people and culture. With time we have made our hiring process more particular. If you want to work with C4E – you need to invest at least 2 hours on pre-reads listed on this page, fill in a long form, meet us a few times, do a paid assignment and then you may have a chance to get in. No, we don’t offer perks that even the smallest of companies offer but if you are in, you are treated as a human and not as a resource. And we promise a place that would give shoulders to your dreams.
Village. I read this quote (apparently by Kabir) and it has left an indelible impression on me.
साईं इतना दीजिए, जामे कुटुंब समाए मैं भी भूखा न रहूं, साधु न भूखा जाए
C4E is an excuse to support the entire kutumb (aka family) and the ones that need it. The best representation of that is in the shape of villages of the yesteryears – where each resident has their own thing and the collective contributes to that thing. And vice versa. More on it here.
So, the C4E Village is a safe space for people to experiment, do and learn from different perspectives. If you think you want to support C4E and be a part of the village, please let me know and I’d love to have you around!
Revenue. In the year that ended on Mar 23, we did almost 2 crores of topline. I wanted to end Mar 2024 with 20 crores. We would end at 4+ crores. So, on one side I failed to get us to 20. And on the other, we did very well to grow more than 2X. All credit goes to people at C4E.
The best part? Our biggest client accounts for less than 40% of the top line. We offer 4 distinct kinds of services and none contributes more than 40% to the top line. So we are well diversified, derisked from ruin and at a great place to scale from here on!
Clients. We added some great names to our repertoire. We now have a mix of startups, global conglomerates, individuals and our own projects. And I love that we are challenged by a wide range of problems. Some of these were…
Brand design / redesign for a global tea brand, a technology outsourcing company, a real estate giant and others
Brand consulting for businesses operating in undergarments on one side and enabling solar adoption on the other and many more in the middle
Manage social media presence for the likes of a global healthcare giant, a concrete equipment leader, a construction equipment player, a couple of insurance companies, a fintech festival and more
Content for the likes of a Tourism department, a Swedish furniture giant, one of the largest global technology companies and others
Personal brands for a few CXOs
I am sure there’s more. But these are at the top of my head at this time.
I am proud to say that we stopped working for a few clients and returned money when we realized that our culture and ethos were not in alignment. We don’t know if they were wrong or we were. But we didn’t see alignment and decided that it was better to part ways.
And if this is of any interest, one of the short films that we made got a famous actor (Manav Kaul) his first ever Filmfare Award!
As I end the bit about C4E, I maintain that all of us at C4E know that our Mahabharata is around the corner and we want to be ready when we get to it.
Projects. We invest all that we make into projects. These are independent of C4E but are run by people at C4E. Our projects around books, films, podcasts, and women continue to help us learn more and scale. I would’ve liked them to become independent by now but they are not. This is one of my big failings from 2023. As I build more projects, I will be mindful of this and will aim for revenue from day 0.
Apart from these existing ones, we started one around sustainability and that could not see the light of the day. The ones about alcobev and casting have just started and I should have something to report by the next year.
If I had to pick highlights from these projects, I would single out Purple Pencil Project. We’ve worked on finding our PMF and the best part is that we are now an accredited Publishing company with our first book on its way already!
On SoG
SoG is Shoulders of Giants and no, it’s not inspired by my initials! However, I’ve come to realize that this is my life’s work and this was my biggest failure in 2023. Going forward I would fix this.
Here’s what you’d see from SoG in 2024.
SoG Grant. This idea has been pending execution since 2021! Time flies! In 2024, it will see the light of the day. The idea is simple. I will give an equity-free grant to people who want to chase a large goal but are unable to because they need some financial stability.
I am putting in 100K of my own money. Krishna has agreed to put in about 25. In case you want to put in as well, let me know. This is the least we can do to support young people.
SoG Book. I have AK helping me with this. So odds are, we would ship it. The book is a compilation of letters that I wish someone had written to me when I was young (to help me get wise). Think of Poor Charlie’s Almanack. Or Naval’s Almanack.
SoG 2024. I need to get more young people to be part of the 2024 cohort. If you know any sharp young people, send them here – SoG Application.
Party of 9, SoG edition. An in-person meetup of smart people. For young people. If you know young people between the ages of 15 and 19, please do send this form to them.
Apart from these four, I would try and build campus and city chapters for SoG.
On SG
While I’ve had a great year in terms of work, at a personal level, I haven’t had a good one. I realized that my life is centred around work. I no longer relate to most of my friends. And I continue to spend all my time on things, ideas, thoughts and people from work. So, I may very well be living in an echochamber!
I did not care for my health, I was not a good son, I failed at keeping relationships, I continue to miss having a special someone in my life and most importantly – I am not consistent at all.
Report card from 2023
I stated that in 2023, I would do three large things – write book2, get fit (do a sub-5-hour marathon) and make money (pay back my debt and pay each person at C4E more than what the market would pay).
I failed at and missed the first two. Truth be told, I’ve been missing them for more than 10 years now. And I refuse to give up!
On the third one, I was able to pay back a large part of my debt. I had decided that if I could not pay back my debt by the end of 2023, I would quit. I am happy to report that at least on paper, I have paid it all back.
On people, in most cases, I think I pay more than the market (at least more than their last income or more than what they ask me). I want this to grow as we scale in 2024.
Apart from these three large ones, I had numerous smaller ones. I got some, I did not get some. And while I can beat myself over those, I don’t want to. I don’t want to overinform here but if you want to know more, a detailed report card is here.
In 2024 I plan to work on being consistent and one way to do so is to live in public. Here is where I would track various things that I think will make me better.
So this brings me to the lessons I learned in 2023.
Lessons from 2023
2023 was a remarkable year. I saw a lot of interesting things in action and my thoughts were often challenged. Here are some lessons that I would like to put on paper and share with whoever is reading.
No one owes you anything. You have to work hard to get it.
Money talks. This year I made some money with C4E and when the world saw I had money, I saw people change their behavior toward me.
You get the respect that you ask for. Not what you deserve.
Unreasonable people move you forward. I want to talk about two women here. Aastha and Arti. Aastha is the founder of sya and taught me that you could be unreasonable about work and everyone falls in line. Arti taught me the same when it comes to personal goals and milestones. Thank you, ladies.
Time is painfully short, limited and unpredictable. You plan for the next year and before you know it, you are dead. So, do things now.
Karma does not exist. I used to be a big believer in this but I no longer believe in it.
It’s easy to spot people who fake things. So, never fake.
Actions > Words.
Say yes more than I say no (probably sparked by a recent conversation with friends). All that I have in life has come to me because I’ve said yes more than I’ve said no. This year too I could make money because I said yes. The biggest client came to me because I said yes to cutting my holiday short and meeting the client.
Be the person that’s willing to put in 70+ hours a week. Find more people who can outwork you. If you are not someone that likes this 70+ hours thingy, it’s ok 🙂
You can build luck – my entire life is a testimony.
So that.
Ok. The 2024 plans, goals, ideas, thoughts etc. Here we go…
The “word” for 2024 – Ruthless Consistency
The theme for the year is Ruthless Consistency.
Thanks again AK for this. This year I want to become a consistency machine. This year I would start my days with writing and end with chasing the sunsets. I started the first day of 2024 with writing (this letter). And I hope that I can go see the sunset as I end the day. I went today 🙂
I plan to make a WA group to help keep people accountable – we declare what we want to do every day and we post a photo of that task at the end of the day. Right now there are two of us. If you want in, tell me what would you like to do every day and let’s keep each other on track!
Coming to the goals for 2024, along with the ones I’ve listed already in this letter, here are my top three goals for 2024 on a personal level.
Build SoG – this is the single most important goal I will chase in 2024.
Build brand SG – my personal brand. I’ve realized that if we don’t have distribution, you could do the greatest of things – you would get no ROI. So I want to reach 100K people on various platforms. This may take any shape – podcasts, solocasts, blogs, books, whatever.
Run a sub-5-hour marathon.
On C4E, the goal is just one – make C4E more stable. I will do this by taking the following actions…
1/ Build people. Obnato will continue to be a theme C4E will only grow if people at C4E grow. And I will do whatever it takes to help my people grow.
I would also try and detach C4E from SG. Right now, most of the work comes to Saurabh. And SG can choose to work as C4E, B4U, ABC or whatever. I want C4E to stand on its own legs. We have started to action that already. In 2024, more and more decisions on C4E will be taken by the team.
2/ Build design chops. We continue to be without a design leader. I will fix this in 2024.
3/ Expand in another territory. I will try and set us up in Dubai. Multiple reasons – currency arbitrage, proximity to India, likeness of people, and a few friends. If you know people in Dubai, please connect me. I will be there a lot in 2024.
4/ Build communities. We already have an interest in books, films and more. I want to expand more on these in 2024 and build stronger communities.
5/ Build products. We are a services company and like most services companies, we are at the mercy of a variety of opinions. I want to change that. I don’t know how it would happen but building some productised services or a B2B product or some IP looks like a good idea. Need to think more about this. Oh, I would work hard to make Femela a reality.
6/ Grow business. I will also ensure that we focus on acquiring more clients (and for that, build brand C4E, redo our website, build the scout program, find more partners), quit unprofitable accounts, shut projects that don’t perform, build assets, get prudent about money and all that. I want to end 2024 with 40 crores of topline.
7/ Apart from the 6 listed above, I have a few more things that I want to work on. There is no science, or reason for these but I want to. Here they are…
Build C4E Base
Chase 100 rejections
Teach at some college
Initiate SoG SOTY Award
Be 30” around my waist (lol)
Fix my relationship with money
Learn how to solve a Rubik’s cube
Operate from a place of abundance
Put my photo on the internet (maybe)
Be more groomed and better dressed
Learn Webflow – I tried in 2023 and failed!
Scratch my itch to be around creative people
Learn how to play top-25 most heard songs on Uke
Put some website / page on each domain that C4E owns
Design a tool to review life and may be a planner, while I am at it
Oh, here’s an epiphany. Most of these goals have remained goals for a long time now. And that means I am not growing. I am merely ageing. Sigh!
In the end
I’ll end this by reiterating that I want to be ruthlessly consistent in 2024. Please hold me accountable. I will update this sheet and I plan to send a weekly update to everyone interested. Lemme know and I will add you to the list of people that get that update from me.
Apart from this, I have a few very specific asks. Here they are.
1/ Help me connect with people in Dubai
2/ Help me stabilize C4E – help us in getting more work, introducing us to more people that we can work with
3/ And the most important ask. Tell me your goal for 2024 and I will do whatever it takes to make that come true. Allow me to help you chase your personal bliss in 2024.
And yeah, that’s about it!
Here’s wishing you a glorious, fascinating, fulfilling 2023. May it be the best year of your life.
Thank you for reading! Thank you for your support and patronage!
Gratitude and Regards, Saurabh Garg Jan 1, 2024 Mumbai
PS: As I end this, I must credit YearCompass. I’ve been using it for a few years and I think it gives me a great structure to think about the year gone by.
A list of things that Saurabh Garg plans to work on #in2023. This is my annual post where I list my goals and ambitions and dreams and all that.
Hi! 2023 is upon us. And this is my annual review of what I did #in2022 and what I want to do #in2023. This will be a long post and for the ease of writing and your reading (if someone is reading), I will divide this into sections. Here…
Why this post? What does this post mean to me?
How do I do the review and do a yearly plan?
What did I plan to do in 2022 and how I fared?
Plans for 2023 – Grand ones, small ones and the ones that I would not pursue.
Simple answer. I like the idea of having a sense of control over where I am in life and where I am going. You know, I want me to happen to life (rather than life happening to me) and this review helps me stay the course. All this planning gives me an illusion of control. Of course, it’s a mere illusion. Life has a mind and a plan of its own and there is nothing I can plan or do that will allow me to control it. But I still do this nonetheless.
Apart from this, at a spiritual level, I feel more connected to myself after I have taken time to sit down and do a review and imagine where all I want to go. With all the million dreams and ideas and thoughts, I do get overwhelmed and get scared about the amount of work I need to put in. I do get sad that one life will probably not be enough. And I get to know my limitations as a human and I become a tad more accepting. In fact, recently in a conversation, I told one of my closest friends that I have accepted that I am past. I told her that I have accepted that I will never be the big deal that I have always wanted to be. I admitted that I will die unfulfilled and I would not know what it takes to move the world. So, I need some tethering, some sort of a compass that allows me to not lose my shit.
Plus, I like the idea of living in public. And this public documentation and disclosure help me with a sense of accountability. Of course, the goals I chart for myself are very lofty and I often dont reach the finish line. But that’s ok. I like to shoot for the moon.
With that as the background, let’s get into the how I go about writing this post.
B. How do I do this?
Pretty simple.
I start with my vision board. Then I look at this excel sheet where I have mapped all that I want to do in life. And this document that has my life themes / ethos mapped. I follow it up with a scan of tags like LifeGoals, in2022, in2023, in2026, et al on my notes app (Roam, Apple Notes, Notepads). While I do this, I make notes (mostly on a mindmap). I use Year Compass to help me think better. #in2023 I plan to make a planner of my own. And then I try to make sense of things by putting them in categories of health, wealth, relationships, career, contribution and others. I use the following chart…
Once I have gathered all the information, I go over all those one last time, finalise the mindmap, copy-paste from previous editions and start writing this post.
PS: In case you are interested in knowing how others do it, you may want to check posts from Sahil Bloom, Dick Bush, Shane P and others.
PPS: I need to write a longer post on how I do this. Maybe sometime later. #parkedIdeas
C. What did I plan and do in2022
the top three goals for #in2022 were…
Write and publish book2
Lose weight, get fit (and learn dance, run a marathon etc)
Make money (revenue, debt etc)
The longish post on all that I wanted to do in2022, is here.
Funny thing is that I have chased these exact goals since I can remember and I did not get even close to even one of these.
For book2, I made a few starts (LFWc2, 80K words for AK in the month of Oct) but I was unable to close it.
For fitness, I didn’t even move an inch. I did order a yoga mat in the last week of December!
For money, while I had a few good months, I was back to the same spot where I started the year with (taking on more debt to service expenses). I know what I do and how I operate is not sustainable but I remain hopeful that what I do will someday make sense.
#note2self: The surprising thing is that none of my goals were related to the work I do (brand consulting / events / marketing consulting etc). I mean the money goal is an outcome of work but I did not specifically plan what work I would do to make money.
This year as well, I will keep the three large ones the same as the previous years (book2, health and money). I however will add a few smaller goals (some new ones, some old ones that I haven’t been able to work on at all). I will come to those in a bit, but #in2023, I will put a larger focus on health than on anything else.
And before I get to other things, lemme do a month-on-month review of how I spent 2022. Wait. More than a review, this is a list of highlights and lowlights from the year gone by.
C.1. Month-on-month highlights from 2022
Jan – Signed a couple of new clients. One of them would eventually make me spend 3-4 months in Bangalore. More on this in a bit.
Feb – FT crossed 100 episodes. Thanks to the effort by AD and the team. While it’s helping us create the noise that we have a popular podcast, it is offering no tangible value. Not sure what to do about it. And no, not shutting it for sure.
Feb – Lost a client. This is one of those rare clients where I (and C4E) was let go because I did not perform.
Feb – Met Ankesh Kothari. I’ve met him just twice but he’s left an indelible impression on me. I wish I could be friends with him!
Apr – Did an event at Indore. Loved it. Wish I could do larger, grander events. I think it will never happen and I will die with this as an unfulfilled wish. And no, I am not ok with it. May be if I get to make a film, that would replace the trill of putting an event together? Let’s see.
Jul – Exchanged tweets and got an opportunity to work with a billionaire. While I had the opportunity, I couldn’t convert. This has to be amongst the biggest fails of the year for me. The other thing to note here is that Twitter helps me create grander opportunities than any other social network.
Aug – Along with Shikha, produced my first ad-film as a producer. I plan to expand this further in 2023.
Sep – DD went live – thanks to the hard work of Chandni, Pooja, Anshika, Vaishnavi and their team. This is one of my most ambitious projects. I hope we can take it to its destiny.
Oct – Started to keep a weekly track of what did I achieve at C4E. I should’ve done this sooner. Inspired by the tweet from Elon Musk where he asked Twitter CEO about what he did this week.
Nov – Thanks to VG, moved into a house far fancier than my aukaat. My worry is, now that I have lived here, how would I adjust to living anywhere else?
Dec – Stumbled upon Zakir Khan’s work. And I am enamoured. Like all his fans, he speaks to me at such a deep level that it feels as if he’s baring my soul on camera! See this for example. And this.
So that was my 2022 in a nutshell. Lemme catalogue big losses and wins.
C.2. Big Losses #in2022
Here is a list. In no order…
1/ I lost three big clients during the year. One I lost because we couldn’t perform. I have learnt my lessons from the loss and I am committed to not repeating. The other two we let go by ourselves. And that’s ok. I am realising that I am not ice cream and I can’t please everyone. I am ok to let go of revenue opportunities if I dont see myself or my team getting respect, learning new things or expanding our luck surface area. Oh, we did get QUITE a few new clients.
2/ I spent good 5 months in Banglaore and I couldn’t capitalise on my time there. By capitalising, I mean I should’ve been able to build a network there. But I. was unable to. As I retrospect, I realise, I made three mistakes.
I lived FAR away from the startup hotspots and that meant I couldn’t travel from where I lived to where those events were.
I did not carve out time to meet more people. I was lazy and I waited for the magic to happen. No, it doesn’t happen if you dont move your ass.
I did not have a personal brand. If I had one, people would have travelled to meet where I was. And would have taken time out at a time when I was available.
While the first two are fixable easily (I will now ensure that I live in the middle of the hotspot and I will invest a LOT of time in meeting people), I need to think hard about the third one #in2023.
3/ Got an opportunity to work with a billionaire and I couldn’t capitalise on it. Truth be told, I did EVERYthing in my power to make it happen. Including wearing a white shirt and shoes to go and meet him IRL but for some reason, I could not capitalise on it.
So this. Now onto the wins…
C.3. Big Wins #in2022
Here is a list. Again, in no order…
1/ Strengthened Team C4E. Against all odds. And I had to take on debt to be able to meet the payroll (I still need to make enough to fund the team on a month-on-month basis). But I did manage to strengthen the team.
This means that people that work with me at C4E are engaged and they like it here. We are building a company that is safe, kind, humane and inspiring. Each day is exciting for people (well, most days, not each day). They enjoy and look forward to interactions with each other.
Of course, I am merely hoping all this is true. The team at C4E may or may not agree with this. If this pic is to be believed, they are happy 🙂
Team C4E and friends. Oct 2022.
2/ Operated from a sense of scarcity. A prime example is point 1 above.
3/ Interacted with two dollar-billionaires. Even if those meetings were of no use and even if they would not remember my name. Just to be standing next to them was inspiring. I hope I can meet more such people. And become one of those 🙂
4/ TRS and PPP started to make money! I have been funding these for years and we finally have cash flow coming in. Whatever they make is still not enough to run their operations but it’s a start nonetheless. Podium anyway makes some cash flow. #in2023, I hope these three (and DD as well) makes enough to break even.
That’s about it. I am sure there are more but these are the ones that I want to highlight as big achievements from the year.
#note2self: All my wins and losses are from work. Maybe I need to think harder about this.
You can’t control the outcomes. You need to keep at it. Take steps. One at a time.
You need a marriage of ethos before you can do anything together with others.
People are inspired by things that give them the opportunity to do things larger than themselves. You know, showing them the vastness of the sea?
Community trumps an individual.
Young people are fascinating. We all need to spend more time with young people.
Ready, Fire, Aim is the best damn strategy.
Timing is everything and one must ALWAYS err on the side of action. If you dont act fast, you lose opportunities. And while opportunities are not scarce, that particular opportunity would disappear faster than you know it.
As I work towards my goals #in2023, I hope I can keep these at the top of my mind and act!
D. The plans and goals and dreams for #in2023
I will divide this into large goals, small goals, things I will say no to and other random words.
D.1. Three Large Goals for #in2023
The three large goals for 2023 remain the same as they were in 2022 and in 2021. And maybe in 2020 and earlier.
The point is, there is nothing else that I want more. The other things I already have. I mean I have a family that is as supportive as one would want. I have friends that back me up when I need them to. I have a team that loves each other. I have clients that talk to me with respect. I am slowly building a community of people that have the same ethos as me.
I can’t ask for anything in the relationship department (except for love – I am giving up on that). So, the three goals are…
Write and publish book2
Lose weight (get to 30″ waist), get fit (and learn Bhangra, run a sub-5 marathon, do Killer Boogie etc). Within this, I will focus on health / fitness and add things like yoga, massages, steams, multivitamins, protein shakes, cold showers et al to the routine. In fact, I have promised that this year the only reading I would do would be health-related books. And I will take notes and I will implement those in my life.
Make money (pay back the debt I have on my head and then make enough revenue to pay Team C4E more than what the market would pay them and live to that maxim about enabling others)
If I could add a 4th to this list of three, I would say I want to amplify my personal brand. But let it be in the “other goals”. Here they are.
D.2. Here are “other goals” and plans
Here’s how I will reach these goals. In no order…
1/ Build Brand SG The goal, the Northstar metric of this is that when I walk into a room, people must know who I am and they must want to get into a business transaction with me.
To be able to achieve this, I need to be known as resourceful, reliable, intelligent, trustworthy, effective and all that. And I need to be known as an expert. On things that those rooms are discussing. I still need to work on what those things are but a broad selection would be Marketing, Startups, Storytelling, Coolness, Writing, Productivity, Creativity, People, Mentoring, Problem Solving, Web 3 and more. I know this is a LOT and I need to reduce this list to a handful.
The tangible goal is to have 100K followers each on Twitter, Linkedin and Instagram. I also want to be more visible on the Internet and in the media. Again, I dont know how to do that but I shall try. I recently created a team to help me with it. Let’s see where we reach.
2/ Preserve my mornings. I dont think I have issues in waking up early. I will continue to do that.
The change I would make is that no one would be able to reach me before 9 AM. Maybe 10. I would in general take up meetings early (to reach early and avoid traffic). Now, I will try and refuse those. Nothing before 11 if it includes travel. Of course, I know that I may not be able to maintain this but I will do this as much as I can.
3/ Save my energy. This means I will let go of people and things that take my energy away. Even if I have had years and years of vested interest and investment in those. You know, sunk costs.
While this energy concept is new to me, but as I grow older, I realise that this is an important one. More on this some other day. But I will sort of fade away in the bushes. You know, how Homer does it?
That!
Homer is DA bomb!
4/ Become a People Magnet While I try and preserve my energy, I also want to become a people magnet. This means I want to attract talented, bright and interesting people to meet me and shower me with whatever they can offer!
I dont have a tangible for this. In vague terms, I need to be the person that people want to meet even if they have to travel miles and miles to meet me.
5/ Eat home-cooked food. Till the April of 2023, I have a house that comes with domestic help. I will try to eat as much home-cooked food as I can.
Post-April I need to find a place to live and will see if I can afford domestic help at that point. We shall see when that happens.
6/ Get frugal. I anyway dont spend a lot of money needlessly. But I will become even more frugal with it. I have spent 4528 since morning today (morning of Jan 1, 2023). Lol! And each month, I will save at least 40% of what I make. At least till April when I have to pay just a tiny rent. Post that, we shall see.
7/ Chase 100 rejections I’ve been wanting to do this for a while now. I think this year I will try and chase these rejections.
8/ Become a shoulder for others. SoG will become my life’s purpose, goal, Ikigai, whatever. I need to do more of it. There are multiple things within this – SoG book, SoG grant, Team SoG and more. Each has to become big!
Oh, I will roll out the SoG Grant (I first thought about it in 2021) this year.
9/ Help others reach their goals. See this tweet and this one. I will try and remind people of these goals each month.
10/ Establish C4E Base I wrote the following in my 2021 plan…
Adopt an old bungalow and convert it into a cultural hub of sorts that creative people can call home. Maybe replicate it across the world. Like Soho House but far more affordable and far more meaningful. Got inspired by this person. Part of Personal / Curiosity.
I want to make this happen this year. This is also in line with my thought on being a people magnet, having more handshakes (compared to Zoom meetings), becoming a shoulder for others and do more!
11/ Do a Startup What I do at C4E is fantastic but I am still a services company and I need to find a way to not rent my time.
12/ C4E International In case I am unable to do #11, I will try and take C4E beyond India. The long-term goal is to be out of India and I need to take steps in that direction already.
#note2self: Need to do a similar review / plan for C4E. Apart from international operations, I am thinking about evolving into a collective (getting more people to be a part of the loose network), establishing niche agencies (women, youth, web 3 etc), creating a line of products and more.
13/ A Film Script I really want to have my name in a film. And I want to do whatever it takes to make it happen. But then I am on the edge on this. The priority would be book2. If I get that out of the way and I am left with time, I may pick this up.
So these are minor goals for #in2023.
I know this is a long list but these are all secondary goals. Ambition is to get the primary ones going!
Other things that I want to do but I am saying no to in2023…
In no order…
Poker. I will get back to it once I have achieved financial freedom.
Pool. I thought about getting back to it. But I realised I am not good at it to be world-class and thus no point putting time and energy into it.
LHV (unless I am compelled to do it for elevating my brand).
Needless travel. While I love to travel and I like the idea of exploring newer places, with a heavy heart, I will say no to it this year. Unless it’s for work or with my family. So, no friendly trips, no needless holidays, no relaxation ones.
Minimalism. I have always liked the idea of having no material possessions and living an untethered life. I will change this. I will acquire things that make my life more comfortable, more convenient and more productive. So for example, I will buy massage rollers, shakers (for protein shakes), hardware for computers etc.
PS: These are the 5 that I can think of right now. Over the year, I will keep adding to this. Maybe I will bring some from the 13 above into this!
Let’s see.
So, in the end…
I’d like to end this post and the year plan with two things.
1/ I plan to live a lot more in public this year. This means that I will share what I am up to on a public forum. This sheet specifically. This is WIP and I will evolve this over the next few weeks.
2/ This is a vision board that my friends made for me on my 40th birthday. I am reproducing it here (have redacted a few things). Before this year, I have never had a team of my own. The only people I have been responsible for (and there too I did not do a good job) were my family. But now I have people to take care of and be accountable to. And thus I will have to work hard to live up to their expectations.
I will use this board as a reminder to self!
This is what the team at C4E made for me. I was surprised that they could capture my ambitions and plans so well, and that too in one document!
The mantra for 2023?
As I end this, I would say that the mantra for 2023 would be…
Me. Enabled by we. We. Enabled by me.
Here’s a post that I wrote on the last day of 2022 that captures this well…
This is how I would summarise the year that went by. And how I hope 2023 would be. Posted here first.
That’s about it for the time being. My review of 2022. And ambition for 2023. Apart from this post, I have captured these on a mindmap as well. In case you want a copy, please do let me know.
Here’s wishing you a glorious, fascinating, fulfilling 2023. May it is the best year of your life.
Thank you for reading! Thank you for your support and patronage!
Saurabh Garg 1 Jan 2023, Mumbai
PS: Here are a few disclaimers…
I tend to operate on extremes. While planning, I assume that I am God and I can do everything and anything. So I am VERY VERY optimistic about my plans. So if I know that I want to write 100K words in the year, I will plan to write 200K. And while doing a review, I am harsher on myself than I am optimistic. So if I end up writing the 100K words I had planned, I assume that I’ve written just 50K.
Each year, thus, I list down a million lofty things that I want to achieve in the course of the year. And beyond. I always aim far beyond what I know I am capable of. I mean unless I aim for the moon, how do I get to be in the middle of stars?
A list of 40 things that I would like to do in my 40s.
So, I am turning turned 40 this year and here is a list of things that I will do in my 40s.
By this age, I was supposed to be financially free and contribute to making a dent in this world. I am of course very very far from any of those goals that I had for myself, I do believe that I have a deeper appreciation for life and work and other things. And in this decade, since I am not sure if I am getting closer to dent, I will for sure do things that I have always wanted to!
And thus, here is a list of things that I will do in the next decade. In no order (but bifurcated into sections)…
PS: I know some of the following are goals, some are systems, some are one-time activities and some are all.
Health
Eat better. This is not a tangible or measurable goal but I want to make a conscious effort. So I will use shortcuts. I will eat natural, organic, and unprocessed food. I will eat fewer carbs. I will not eat anything that may not be edible at room temperature (no ice-creams). I will be mindful of what and how I eat.
Take a shot at Everest. My deadline to do this is Jan 1, 2026. Also, after I went to the base camp last year, I am on the fence about even trying. But let’s see. And if not Everest, do a serious amateur hike every year. The experience is very very humbling and one must do treks often.
Make sleep a priority. As I grow older, I am unable to function if I haven’t had good sleep the previous night. I will be 8 hours in bed without devices. No screen. Not even TV. 8 might be overkill. The point is, I dont want to be tired when I wake up. And if that means I need to say no to work and say no to money opportunities, I will say no. Sleep will become a priority.
Family / Friends / Relationships
Make parents a priority. Move them to the same city as I. I know I plan to be a nomad per se and it may not pan out but I will try.
Make parents travel to one new place EVERY year. And do this in relative comfort and luxury. I mean I may not be able to fly them in business class but I will not put them in a bad taxi. And thus I need money. For the money, I dont have an upper limit per se but it has to be at least 5 lakhs a year. And most important, accompany them as much as possible.
Find love. I am not sure if I am capable of being loved – I am way too rational when it comes to real life (and a dreamer on the other end when it comes to work). And I say this with all sincerity.
Work
Stop active work. This means I will not be responsible for day-to-day operations.
Teach a full-time course.
Prevent my mornings from others at all costs. See this.
Become very very active with #BrandSG. To a point that before I walk into a room, people know who I am. As part of this, I will make a brand manifesto that will have tenets that are dear to me (say, Zubaan Ki Keemat).
I will become financially free. This means that I will have enough that I dont need to worry about money and yet I can support everyone around me. You know, “Saain itna dijiye, jaame kutumb samaay, main bhookha naa rahoon, sadhu na bhookha jaaye“. Some people call it FU Money (I mean not really, but the same zone). Right now, the number is 10 crores. Each year that I dont get to this, I will add 25% inflation. And once I get to it, from there on, become a billionaire. And then the richest man in the world. I know that this pursuit of THE richest may not bear fruit. But I want to try. And get there.
Get a membership at MCA. I challenge that I’ve been on since 2019.
Yeah! That’s all I want. Not more. Not less.
Impact / Contribution / Spirituality
Teach writing to 100 people a year. And in 10 years, 1000 people.
Get mentioned in thank you of 100 books. Right now, the number is 2 or 3.
Get mentioned in the Oscar acceptance speech 100 times. Right now, the most thanked person at the Oscars is Spielberg (some 42 times).
Expand SoG network (and alumni) into a million young people. Right now, we are in the low two digits. I have no clue how to do this. But I want to make this my life’s work.
Build SoG Grant into a gateway for young people to explore their interests. And expand the network of recipients to a thousand people!
Build LHV into a substantial venture investment vehicle.
Take C4E or one of our ideas to a point where our impact reaches a few million people. So far we are in the hundreds. PS: I like how I talk about C4E as a collective already. #win
Each year, do at least 10 days of no-connection to existing people kind of trip (Vipassana, gumnaam sheher me anjaan insaan, treks etc.)
Become a pillar of support to people around me. This will happen if I am able to do all the ones I’ve listed above.
Hobbies
Play a musical instrument on a stage with more than 1000 people in the audience. I got myself a Uke. VG gifted me a guitar long ago. Krishna got me a Uke as well. So despite all these divine interventions, I’ve not been able to get to it. Let’s see what happens this time.
Travel to 100+ countries. So far I’ve done 40 odd. This seems like an easy one to do!
Move to a different country and live there for a few years. This I want to do within the next 2 years. #in2025
Publish at least 3 books. Lol!
Make 1 feature film. This one looks the most plausible.
Get to know 10 billionaires on a first-name basis. Right now I know none.
Be more active on social media and chase vanity metrics. 100K on Twitter, 100K on Instagram and 100K on YT. Or any other platform that is large at the time.
Misc
Get consistent. Do EVERYthing I say I will do. This will be HARD!
Move to an iPad and quit using a laptop. This should be easy!
Ensure that people that have put their faith in me get closer to their life goals. This is what I want to live for!
Release 100 Youtube videos where I am talking to random people that I want to talk to. So, for example, I should release a YT conversation with my favourite musician.
So that!
And as I end this, here are some footnotes…
This is NOT a comprehensive list. As of 24 Sep, these are 38. I need to figure out 2 more.
A list of things that I plan to work on #in2022. This is my annual post where I list my goals and ambitions and dreams and all that.
Hello! So a new year is here upon us. And more than anything else, to me, it means that I have a new list of things to do, new impossibles to chase down, new shiny objects to get enamoured by, new dreams to be converted into reality and in general, take new shot at a fresh start.
Thing is, I love the idea of new. New people, new places, new opportunities, new years. The new year specifically to me is an opportunity to reset. To restart. To be a buffoon again. For what’s it worth, I find the notion of a restart or a reset very very cool. Even though I am older by a year and ought to be a tad wiser, most probably I am not. And I am ok with that. For one, I refuse to believe that I am older. At least in my head, I remain a young, fool that continues to believe that I will live forever. And second, I continue to believe that life is malleable per whims.
PS: I must say that even though I believe I would live forever, I am very very aware of my mortality. I know the time is limited. And to make matters worse, none of us knows when our time would be up. So, I am an ageist. I like the idea of doing things here and now. Yeah, I am full of dichotomies and made up of contradictions.
Each year, thus, I list down a million lofty things that I want to achieve in the course of the year. And beyond. I always aim far beyond what I know I am capable of. I mean unless I aim for the moon, how do I get to be in the middle of stars?
PS: This moon and stars analogy is wrong it should be the other way around cos the closest star is the Sun, but you get the drift.
So, in this post, I will try and list down things I want to do #in2022.
But before that, a quick recap of the year gone by.
If I were to summarise 2021, I would say it was a mixed bag. I did manage a few things, some that I have never imagined. Like the trek to Everest Base Camp. And I messed up on more things than I would’ve liked. And I made more mistakes than I thought I was capable of. I would list those on my echochamber. The worst is that I am hurt and guilty that I left a few people in the lurch. I mean my hurt is a thing but they must be angry, livid at me! Thing is, one of the maxims I live by is that I want to do onto others as I would them to do onto me. Thus, if I dont fulfil a promise or honour a commitment, I feel really bad. In 2021, there were quite a few of those. This year, I will try to reduce these mistakes.
PS: Here’s contradiction # 2. While I dont want to make mistakes, I know that unless I throw a million darts, the odds of hitting the bullseye are abysmal. So, I need to keep throwing darts. And that would mean I would make mistakes. And that would mean I would end up leaving people in the lurch. I would probably not be able to honour my commitments. A solution could be that I can tell people up front about the “risks” and potential fault lines of working with me. At least they would know what they are getting into? May be.
So, coming to the #in2022 plan,
There are just way too many things that I do and as a result, the energy and attention are scattered all over the place. To a point that I can’t even seem to make a list of things that I want to work on in the coming year. But then if I look at those things closely, there is this pattern that seems to emerge. There are a few broad themes that I chase in life. No, none of these are unique, neither is the combination unique. Just that somehow I am gravitated towards these, even if I want to move away. So, rather than going against the force of nature, I thought, this year, lemme embrace this!
So this year, I will do something different. I will not make a list of goals public. Rather, I will identify a few broad themes that I want to stand for in life. And thus, rather than chasing a list of goals this year, I will create systems that allow me to be consistent and insync with these themes. And if along the way, my goals are met, I’d talk about those and celebrate those.
Without further ado, here are the themes for 2022…
1/ Network. The importance of being insanely connected was always known to me but in 2021, I saw it in action. I totally understand, at a deep level, when people say that your network is your net worth. #in2022, I want to work hard on amping my network. If this means I need to send out 1000 cold emails this year to random people, I would (this is an example of a goal that I would typically set for myself). If this means I need to find a system to manage all the people I talk to and conversations I have with them, I would. If this means I need to leave a lot of money on the table, I would. If this means I need to dress well and put myself out of my comfort zone by going to parties and getting into inane discussions about films, politics, food, wine and all that, I would. You get the drift.
2/ Open doors. For self. And for others. This is a mini-theme in continuation to the one above. I would work to open as many doors as I can for myself and for others around me. Especially for the ones that have put their trust and faith in me. #in2022, I will become a super-connector. I would become like Red, “a regular Sears and Roebuck”?
Brings me to the next thing.
3/ People first. I am not a creator per se that can work in isolation and create magic. And then hope that those wonders would allow me to earn a livelihood while I sit in a cave. Neither am I a maverick that is so good that I create one piece of work that allows me to earn passively. And I am definitely not the one to create schemes that promise “lessons” to others and profits of that.
Plus, most of the work I get is from connections I’ve made over the years. The key clients that I work for right now, I first made their acquaintance in 2006, 2013, 2014 and 2017 respectively. The most recent client was “acquired” in 2017. 4 years ago. Clear example of the value and utility of long-term thinking / relationships. So, #in2022, I will do whatever it takes to become a people magnet. Attract people. Add value to their lives. Expect nothing. Invest. And let the seed of the relationships germinate and compound. And wait for the fruit.
PS: This is similar to 1 and 2 but there is a tiny difference. While 1 and 2 and more action-oriented, this one is little more open-ended. I mean I dont know what it takes to be a magnet. I have a tough time holding attention of people when we are not talking work and here I am. Trying to a magnet!
Also, this year, I am making a commitment to help a friend reach his life goals.
4/ Do difficult things. All my life, I’ve had it easy. From parents to family to friends. Actually no. Things haven’t been easy at all. It’s probably my attitude that makes them look easy. Digressing. The point is, I believe I can do even more difficult things than what I do right now. Or have ever done. So, #in2022, I will do things that take me out of my comfort zone. For example, talking to strangers, dressing well, asking for help, calling a spade a spade, leaving behind dead weight when I want to move on, not being afraid of ridicule, chasing rejections, getting into more debates (even if they are public), putting myself out there, etc etc.
In one line, take more shots at things that I know for sure are out of my reach.
5/ Cash flow. Since I took my first shot at entrepreneurship (no, not the time when as a kid I rented comics), each thing I worked on, with each idea, I would chase everything but cash flow. #in2022, unless I see clear cash flow with things I am working on, I will not work on those.
Except when I get to learn with those ideas. Or when the idea allows me to build on top of what I’ve already built. Or when an idea expands the cohorts of people I know.
So, any new “community” play is out. And yes, more “new” things are probably in.
PS: This is a bit hazy, to be honest. But I hope to crystalise this in a few weeks.
6/ Ship. This is linked to the one above. Most times, with most ideas, I would merely imagine the start point and the end state and then I would forget about those. This is probably why there was no cash flows with ideas. #in2022, I would ensure that I ship. Enough of talking.
My method to ship remains the same – find partners to work together. I know I cant do things by myself. Just that, this year, I would be more prudent and judicious with how I partner up. All this while, I would look for ambition and passion as the filter. I assumed that I could manipulate get them to see world from my lens. I was mistaken.
Going further, I would look for just the ethos. Once that’s in sync, other things are easier to work on. I for one am very clear in how I operate and what ethos I have and thus I should be able to filter people on the basis of that.
And of course, vice versa. The ones I choose to work with may not like me or my ethos. So, I need to fit in their ethos-system as well. Unless this marriage of ethos happen, I dont think I would partner up.
7/ Finish. Again, linked to 5 and 6, I am guilty of starting a million things and not taking even one to a logical conclusion. As a mentor (AS) pointed out (way back in 2019), I think I know the path that I need to walk to get to the end line and thus I dont actually do it.
So, #in2o22, when I start a project, I will know the “end state” of that project before hand and I will ensure that I take it to the end state. If a project’s end state is planned for after 10 years, I will know the milestone for each of those 10 years. And aim for each of those. Of course, each idea is like a human being. You imagine it to have some sort of life and in a few months, you realise that it is on a very different trajectory altogether. Which is fine. But when I give birth to an idea, I will ensure that I know the milestones for that. And work towards shipping and finishing those. So that!
8/ Self First While a lot of what I want to do is for others and by others, I will make myself the centre of my universe. If I wasn’t already. I would also work towards making my word have more gravitas. And I would want to be known for my ability to get things done and open doors.
This was on my list last year also to be honest but I couldn’t work on this.
9/ Grow This is a simple one.
Will happen automatically if I stick to the themes. I want to grow as a person, as a thinker, as a doer, as a getting things done guy, as a speaker, as a business person etc.
So these are the themes for the year.
Coming to the goals, of course I have a long list of goals that I want to chase this year. Here they are…
The tangible and measurable goals for the year.
For example, I want to be 32″ when I end this year. I have made a bet to get my photo plasterd on a hoarding if I am not. I also want to buy a luxury car this year. That means I need to be in a debt-free state. Then, I want to be Japan for a bit. I want to have more followers on twitter. Publish my book. Run a marathon. Climb a 6K meter mountain. Start playing poker again.
I am not listing any of those here. The top three goals remain the same. These are…
Write and publish book2
Lose weight, get fit (and learn dance, run a marathon etc)
Make money (revenue, debt etc)
Yes, there are other sub-goals within these goals. And there are other philosophical goals. I have a sheet I’ve been using since 2017 or so to list my goals. Should people ask for it, I am happy to open it up and add to this post here. But that would be meaningless as I am sure that I want to chase themes and not just the goals.
So yeah! That’s about it for #in2022. Let’s make this the best year of lives so far!
Over and out!
PS: Like each year, at some point I will write a list of the highlights of the year gone by. And the lessons I learnt. Need a few more days for this. Let’s see when I post that.
PPS: I need to talk about the moonshot and lifegoals and how this years fits into that grand scheme. I need another post for this. For the time being, this is dense enough for me to lose whatever hair I’ve left on me.
PPPS: To be able to write this, I relied on Year Compass, my vision board and my notes that I’ve been taking over the years. The North Star has remained the three large goals that I want to achieve in life – climb the Mt. Everest, have a billion dollars in cash and impact a billion lives.
And here are yearly posts from previous years – 2021, 2020, 2019, 2018, 2017, 2015, 2014, 2013, and 2012. I may have some data / notes from the years prior to 2012. I can try and pull those out but I dont see the merit and thus they shall remain buried in some drive somewhere.
Finally, to be honest, as I read the updates for 2021 and 2020, I realised those were written so much better. And not a lot has changed. I am still talking about the things that I talked about years ago. I am in stasis 🙁
Saurabh Garg’s quarterly letter to friends, mentors, seniors, co-workers and others about how and what he did in the months gone by.
I send this letter to some of my mentors, friends, clients, and others that have shown a disproportionate interest in my life. The letter includes unfiltered, unedited, raw thoughts about life and work and all that. Even though I send a shorter version of this via email, here is the unabridged version for everyone on the world wide web to see and react to.
Hi! I am Saurabh Garg. You may remember me from conversations we’ve had over the years (or recently, in some cases). This is a quarterly-ish update about my life, to people like you that have shown an interest in my life.
Here we go…
“Executive” Summary
For me, the months of JFM 2021 were a turnaround compared to how 2020 was. I got new work, moved back to Mumbai (from Goa), and tried to get more things done. Post that, AMJ 2021 was about consolidation. I finally got some cash flow going. And thanks to that, I hired some people across various projects that I support. I even started investing. And most importantly, I started saving.
JASON 2021, however, in one word, was disappointing. I could not sustain the momentum. I lost a few projects. More than the money, I lost face. And I lost my reputation. One of the projects overshot the budgeted estimate by 3X. I should have expected that considering that it was a film. But I did not. I started a syndicate to invest in startups, but I could not close any deal per se except making personal investments.
And now, I am back to a point where I am seeking work and taking whatever comes my way, even if it’s paying me peanuts and taking away my soul. It sucks, but I am grateful that I have work, even in this day and age.
And yes, I do have a few things in the good-things department. Allow me to talk about these in a bit.
Meanwhile, here’s a detailed update.
A. Losses / Shortcomings / Failures
This one is a long list. At least ten things on this one. Trying hard to make it shorter and save the face :D.
i. Work. At work, I took on a project that I thought knew I could deliver great things. But I could not. Despite all my earnest attempts, and it sucks that I failed at it. This is one of my most visible and public failures, and I have accepted it and decided to move on. The lesson I am taking away is that while I aim for the moon, I need to try and recognise things that are not moving and cut losses sooner.
ii. SoG Grant. Could not work on it. I could not issue it. Got busy. And once I had time, I did not have the money required to support the grantees. Will get to it at some point. The lesson I am taking away? Side projects need to be taken up one at a time. And once I commit to one, I need to allocate some budget to it and keep that money aside.
iii. LHV. Started with an angel investing syndicate with a couple of friends. Tried hard but could not get traction. I had overestimated my ability to get access to people that could invest in my decisions. While we could not raise the rounds required, we put our savings into the companies we were backing. So, the heart is at the right place. Just that I could not execute it well.
iv. Podcasting. I tried my hands at hosting a few more shows – one for investors, one for marketers, and another for people that I find interesting. I couldn’t get enough guests to be excited about any of these shows. Plus the handful that I could get, I don’t think the conversations were good enough. And then, since there was no traction per se, I lost interest.
I know that being an independent content creator is important to me. And yet, for some reason, I am unable to push the pedal on it. I think I suffer from imposter syndrome. I think I am not good, and I am constantly questioning why would someone listen to what I have to talk about. So that. I need to find a solution to this. The lesson I am taking away? None!
As against the planned goals for 2021 (listed here), I have missed almost all the goals. There are a few that I want to talk about. Just to remind myself that those are open. Here…
Book2. I have been missing this for a long long time. While I know I want to tell this story, I haven’t been able to work on it. Life has kept me busy. Must work on it.
Brand SG. I had decided to work on creating a personal brand for myself. However, I did not even begin to move the needle on this. This would’ve been the single most important thing that I would have worked on. In fact with each passing day I realise the importance of having a great personal brand. This is something that I will make a priority #in2022.
Marathon / Fitness. This has been a goal since I can remember. And I am unable to move myself. Thing is, I can’t even walk a few steps without losing my breath. Plus the hernia. I don’t know when and how will I start on this! While I write this, I must mention that I could hike upto the Everest Base Camp (in Sep-Oct). And come back. Alive.
There is more. But this is it for the time being. Will do a longer review towards the end of the year.
B. Wins / Achievements
There were a few wins as well. Here are these.
i. Everest Base Camp Hike. Managed to hike up to the Everest Base Camp.
To me, this is the hardest and coolest thing I’ve ever done. I have posted somephotos and stories on Instagram. If you are curious, do check those out. Come to think of it, I was very very sceptical about my ability to do it. But I did it! In fact, I did better than almost everyone that I went with. And one of the outcomes of this hike is that the resolve to do the Everest is now stronger. More on this in subsequent posts.
ii. The daily morning pages that I write? Well, I wrote those every day till I had to leave for EBC. A total of 280 days on the trot. I did not miss a single day. And I restarted as soon as I got back. Since then, I have moved these to email. Lemme know if you would want to get that email. To me, this simple act of doing this every day, even if I was busy, has been the most therapeutic thing ever.
iii. Co-produced yet another short film. This one should be ready for screening / sharing next month. The path we take would be the same as the last one – start with festivals and then try and get it a home at some OTT platform.
Again, the bulk of the work was done by my partner, and I merely financed it. The ambition is that at some point, I will be able to make commercial, large-scale films. These are baby steps to learn, experiment, and get my name out in the market.
iv. Brand workshop for a startup. I ran a brand workshop for a startup. I loved it! More than anything, I love it the most when I work with people to discover things that even they seem to be unaware of. You know, unknown self! I must find a way to do more of these.
So that. There are some other minor achievements as well. I shall skip writing about those.
Moving on to the next section. About the shiny new toys that I am excited about.
C. New projects that I am excited about?
So I have just the December to go before 2021 ends. 1 month may not be enough to do a lot of things but here are a few that I want to work on.
i. Lose 2 inches. Right now, I am 35″. I would like to be 33″ at least. For this, I would want to reduce what I eat, get on a lo-carb bandwagon and try and do OMAD. Let’s see how this goes.
ii. Book2. Lol! I plan to take this as the only non-money-making thing I’d do from December onward.
D. What help do I need?
So, there are a few things that I need help with. Here’s a list.
i. Connect me with the biggest hustler you know of. This has been an ask since I have started working on these letters. I define these hustlers as people that are out there. And they are seeking work, doing things that are out of their league, making connections, aiming higher than they’ve ever done, and more. I want to learn from them. And I want to be inspired by them and their stories.
So, please connect.
ii. Keep me away from Naukri. Thing is, since I can remember, I have wanted to stay away from Naukri. And I have pretty much managed to. For that, I have had to juggle as many things as I can. However, this time, I am this close to giving up and taking up a Naukri. I do make enough to get by, but I put in too much effort for too little ROI, and I can’t seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
So, please help me get “meaningful” work and stay away from Naukri! PLEASE!
In terms of what I can do, in the past, I have worked on producing large-scale events, crafting brand strategy, consulting on digital marketing, ghostwriting, content strategy, and more. I know this sounds scattered but I do have the requisite expertise and demonstrable experience for each. And client references. Both good and bad.
Help me find gigs (freelance only, please) with businesses doing interesting, exciting and impactful things. I want to stay away from the run-of-the-mill stuff, please.
iii. I want to work with a billionaire. Do you know a dollar billionaire that I could work with? I really really want to work with one. In fact, I am willing to give up on the no-Naukri promise if I get to work with one. I am also willing to give up to 5 years of my life and work on their agenda with as much dedication as you may imagine me to have.
Do you know one? Can you make connections? HELP!!!
E. Finally, what can I help you with?
If there is anything that I can help you with, please do let me know. In terms of specifics, there are two things that I can think of.
i. Connecting with others. I believe I have a wide network, and I can find connections where you’d assume they dont exist. In one word, I am a super-connector. I am shameless, and I can knock on the doors and try to open those. For you. To be able to be of help to you. Please let me know in case I could be of use 🙂
ii. I am very resourceful. Plus, I am very handy with marketing, content, writing, the Internet, futurism, emerging technology, and more. If you are stuck on some project, some idea, something, please reach out to me. I would love to be of any assistance / help / inputs / use to you.
***
Guess this is about it from this update.
See you in Jan 2022 with an update on how 2021 was, the plan for 2022, and may be more.
Thank you so much for reading this. And your patronage and attention. Means a lot!
Gratitude and respect, @saurabh Delhi, 30 Nov 2021
PS: Should you want to give me anonymous feedback on this email (or anything else), please go to https://forms.gle/28bVP8DYz2WGdHdp8. And yes, I LOVE not-so-kind, brutal, and honest feedback.
I have started to do a new thing. Rather than the morning pages on this blog, I start my day by writing an email to Team SG. And then I copy-paste it here and redact some parts of it that I want to keep within my team. So while I still live in public, I get even more honest than I can be on a public blog. In fact, I want to reach a point in life where I am able to open my emails, WA chats, and conversations to the world and yet sleep in peace. I know I am far from that but I hope I am there someday.
So, yesterday was a blur. I dont even know where the day went. I did nothing significant or special. I dont know what it was but I was literally a zombie. I, as they say, sleepwalked thru the day. I slept at like 9. And then I woke up at 8ish. 11 hours. For someone like me, if I sleep more than 6 hours, I get mindfucked. So there.
Anyhow, Today’s Diwali. Happy Diwali to each of you!
Growing up, Diwali was an important festival. For two reasons. One, each Diwali, I would come back home to my parents from wherever I was. Most times it’s been easy. At least since 2010, the work I do allows me to control how I spend time around these large festivals. Super grateful for that. Two, I’ve for some reason treated it as the beginning of the new year. Not sure if it’s true. But it has stayed with me even though I have stopped identifying myself as a Hindu. So, to date, I consider this as a new beginning and I try and start planning the next year with all the gusto that one can imagine.
This year is no different. I am home. Yay! And I have started to think about what I’d do #in2022. I just realized that I can type started with just the left hand!
Here are the top three things that I want to do #in2022. These are in order of priority.
Get debt-free. I will not commit to anything that requires substantial money till I can pay off my debt. I will continue to take smaller shots and make tiny investments (these are the ones that create opportunities for me) but I will pay back the loan by end of 2022. I cant live with the stress that I have people that I owe money to.
Write book2. I have been dreaming about it since 2013-14. I need to write it. I know what I write may not make a lot of noise but I have to have to have to write. It’s something that gives me my identity. Everything else, every other attempt at getting an identity has failed. This is the only one that I think I have left.
Get fit. I hate the days when I am unwell. Like yesterday. From today on, I am getting mindful about what I put in my system. I am not eating carbs. From tomorrow. Today is the last day of carbs. Ok. Lo-carbs. I cant remove carbs altogether. And I will get regular with yoga at least. I can’t work out and I can’t run. So, yoga! As they say, yoga se hoga! If I have to wake up early for that, I shall.
Apart from these three, I have a million things that I want to do. I will talk about those as I get along. Funny, money doesn’t feature anywhere in this list. Let’s see when I get to that.
And here’s a large decision. This somehow dawned onto me as I was waking up. That I would write book2 in public. From 15th November onward, I will replace morning pages with text for book2. And try and complete it by end of this year.
I will seek help from the community and I will post updates on Twitter and Instagram and all that. I will share chunks of unwritten texts. I will talk loudly about my process. And I will seek support and inputs from people on how the book is shaped. Even if the book becomes stale and no one buys it, I will tom-tom about it.
The morning pages would be reduced to the journal bit. Let’s see how the experiment goes.
That’s it for the day.
As I end this post, here’s wishing each one of you a very happy Diwali. I hope the year ahead is full of love, luck, happiness, and abundance. For you, your families, your loved ones, and everyone around you. May each of you gets everything you seek. And if there’s anything I can do to push your agenda ahead, please please do let me know.
Emoticon: :(. I have no recollection of the day apart from one or two calls. Was like a zombie!
Mindful Index (on a scale of 10): 0. I tried sitting down for a session of Headspace but was interrupted.
Things that I am grateful for
I was at home and I could sleep in peace. On a day when I wanted to sleep and rest it out.
Things that would make my today great
Letter to bade log. I need to send it today. Most of it is ready. Today is as good a day to send as any.
A daily affirmation. I have what it takes to create opportunties for people around me.
Amazing things that happened yesterday?
I could sleep ok, on a day I need to sleep. That was amazing.
I got an opportunity to write for a film. I may not be able to get it but at least I had an opportunity. That in itself is great. Need to capitalise more on these.
What could have made yesterday better?
If I did not feel so sleepy throughout the day, it would have been better.
Quote for the day “Luck = Opportunity X Preparation”
Here’s the streaks…
OMAD – 0
#book2 – 0
NOFAP – 0
#noCoke – 1
#noCoffee – 1
#aPicADay – o
Daily Journal – 28
Money spent – 3856
Killer Boogie – 0
10K steps a day – 0
Surya Namaskar – 0
Daily Mail to #teamSG – 28
10 mins of meditation – 0. I sat down yesterday but I was unable to.
I talk about festivals and unreasonable people moving the world and making us humans!
7:49. So, the Diwali cheer is in the air. There is lights all around and it’s a fabulous scene! I am in Gurgaon and the lights are brilliant. To a point that I would have loved to just drive around looking at the gorgeousness that us humans are capable of creating. Of course, one may argue that anything we create would never be as gorgeous as what Mother Nature planned so effortlessly. But still. It was gorgeous to walk around.
Anyhow. I like when the world outside is decked up like that. I wish the decking up was a year-long affair. Well, not really. Cos if it was decked up all year long, people wouldn’t feel special about the festivals. You know, how you respect and love things and are attracted to the ones that are rare? That!
Thing is, to me, the meaning of festivals has changed over the years. It was mostly religious when I was young. And then it became an opportunity to meet friends and family and spend time together. Then it became a ritual – you know, a thing in a year that I would do with my family. Something that I know my parents would look up to. I mean I am assuming they looked forward to it. Not sure if they did 😀 Anyhow, Now it has become a time when everyone is on a break and I can use that downtime to think more and do more. I am sure in another few years it would become an occasion to take breaks!
The point is, festivals are lit! And here’s a film that I love AF. Love Actually. It’s a film about love and belonging and seperation and togetherness. Around Christmas, New Year etc. Here’s a song from the film. See it. You know, I often see this and pine to have a love thingy like one of these people. Lol.
Moving on.
The highlight of yesterday was that I had this epiphany about being an unreasonable person. So the people I am working on an event with, the owner of that agency is the most polite, humble, good, kind, AND the most unreasonable man ever.
Let me about his unreasonableness. He is the kinds that will go promise the world to the world. And then deliver. Despite all odds. Anjum Sir said in a class once, “with you, without you or in spite of you”. Anna is like that. If a client wants it, Anna delivers. Inspite of all odds. What’s amazing is not just his ability to deliver things but the fact that he’s got a team of people that can move the mountains to ensure that whatever Anna has committed is done. Come what may.
That is the thing. Unreasonable man. A team that is dying to deliver what the unreasonable man wants. Each of you needs to become unreasonable in your expectations. Each of you needs to find people that you will give an arm and a leg to deliver what you want. And not in an authoritative, abusive, bossy way. But in a way that everyone is aligned to deliver on that. Everyone understands that the magician, the unreasonable is being that not because he is like that but the unreasonableness helps me create opportunities, reputation, and a virtuous circle that elevates everyone!
So that. Here’s a question. Who is the most unreasonable person that you know of? Tell me more about him / her.
And here’s the journal!
Emoticon: :). Was an ok day. I juggled multiple things at work. I managed them quite ok, I guess. I went out for a dinner with some colleagues I am on a project with. Met a friend for wine and all. In all, a nice day. Could do with more such days.
Mindful Index (on a scale of 10): 0. I did a 10-minute session of Headspace but I am still not being in the zone.
Things that I am grateful for
People generally tend to like me, trust me. I am grateful that I give out such vibes.
Things that would make my today great
Work :D. I have a few things open at work and today most clients will not be working. So I will have some peace with it.
A daily affirmation. I am an unreasonbale man and I take shots that are out of my league. And once in a while, I hit those. And it’s pretty amazing when that happens.
Amazing things that happened yesterday? Can’t think of anything specific. It was in general a good day!
What could have made yesterday better?
I got late when I had to meet a friend. I should have been on time. I hate it when I am late.
Quote for the day “It is the unreasonable man that is responsible for all the progress we’ve made as humans.”
