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270621 – Morning Pages

After the longish post yesterday, I am sort of black. Don’t have a lot to talk about. So, a non-meaningful update.

6:15 AM. Up a while ago. Tried sleeping at 10 but by the time I finally hit the sack, it was 12. Lemme start by recapping the mile-long rant I wrote yesterday and how I am faring at various things I talked about.

  • Filled water container and bottles. To a point that I don’t think I will have to order in for the next few days. Good!
  • Since I couldn’t work from my place, went to a friend’s. Promptly fell asleep. Lol!
  • Saw no Netflix. But ended up seeing almost all the videos on this channel. You must check them out! Bad.
  • No coffee but had a RedBull. Bad.
  • Ate one meal of just Dal. But then ate chips and assorted kachra throughout the day. VERY bad.
  • I think I need to find a non-carb thing that I can munch on all the time. I use chewing gum often but it’s either too sweet or a ball of rubber in the. I prefer something savory. Or something like Diet Coke πŸ˜€
  • Did 3 minutes of meditation and 5 push-ups (in 2 reps. For someone like me, 5 is like infinity. Super stoked. I need to be able to do 500 in a day. You know, if I want to build strength in my arms! Good!
  • Walked some 3K steps. The plan is to get out more and reach some 15K a day.
  • Slacking on work yet again. I still haven’t figured this as an answer.

So, more bads than goods. But then some goods nonetheless. So that’s a good thing. Need to have more goods and less bads. And then monitor these closely so that I only have goods and no bads. Ok, enough of this good and bad wordplay. Has stopped making sense.

Lemme think what I want to talk about today.

As I write this, I am back to listening to Singh is King title track. On loop.

In highlights, along with AD, I started with the Podium Writing Fellowship. The idea is simple. We want to add a leg at Podium by adding text content. Now, the niches we operate in (entrepreneurship, marketing and more) has enough and more competitors to even get started but we believe that the content we have is so good that we can rehash is. The first rehash we’d do is text-based content. You know, newsletters etc.

The trouble with it is to find people to write it. For starters, writers are a rare commodity. It’s tough to find great writers. Second, even if we find some great writers, the way we run The Podium, we don’t have enough cash flow to find writers sustainably.

So AD came with an idea to identify young writers and help them get better. Of course, the responsibility to do so is on my shoulders. I have never delivered a longish course to help others learn but I think I am excited. More than anything else, this would help me improve my writing! In the world where AI would eat creative work (you know, GPT-3), this is an attempt to remain sane by actually doing work that creates meaning.

Ok, I am digressing.

The point is, at The Podium, we are taking so many shots and doing so many experiments that I am hoping one of those will stick and make this struggle worth it, at some point. I just hope we can make enough money for everyone that works with us at The Podium. And of course at all other places where I put my time and energy.

So that.

I am back to listening to discourse by Dandapani. Today’s its this video.

He talks about finite among of energy and attention, life purpose, people that uplift you, importance of attention (over money), death (and the finiteness of life), energy vampires, staying affectionately detached to people (super important for me!), passing on the burden of responsibility, happiness (and pursuit of lifestyle that create happiness).

I love how he talks.
I love his content.
I think I am a fan!

Lemme try and take a stab at this. What is my life’s purpose? At a materialistic level, I still want to make a billion dollars, climb Mt. Everest and while I do both, inspire a billion people! In terms of a little more metaphorical level, I want to enable others I know to do well. Do well is an open-ended thingy. I define it by saying that whatever is your end-state that you want to achieve for yourself (make films, travel the world et al), I want you to enable you to do that!

I seek my happiness in yours. I want to see you succeed and I want to derive joy from that. I want to ensure that you live, grow, thrive on a day-to-day basis and I do whatever it takes to enable you to do that.

No, I dont have the resources to do this for a lot of people and for a living and I still need to make my ends meet. Maybe at some point, I reach that place. Whenever that is. Let’s see.

Need to think more. Need to act more.

Guess this is it for the day. Here’s streaks…

  • Morning Pages / Meditations – 196
  • #aPicADay – 0
  • 10K steps a day – 0
  • OMAD – 0
  • #noCoffee – 0
  • #noCoke – 108
  • 10 mins of meditation – 0
  • #book2 – 0
  • Killer Boogie – 0
  • Surya Namaskar – 0

150521 – Morning Pages

Yet another post where words did not flow and I had to struggle to get my thoughts in order.

5:10. I woke up a few minutes ago. The eyes are still groggy. Had some water. Trying to get over with the morning pages in about an hour and then, get to some real work.

So, COVID-19 took away yet another person I knew. This one did some work for me. I spoke to her almost every month. Worked more closely with one of my partners. While I haven’t met her ever, the sense of loss was something I couldn’t fathom. I don’t know when would this carnage stop.

When I heard about it, I was ok. I was like, “oh fuck” and got onto with my life. Attended a few calls, sent some emails, did more work. Etc. Etc. But during the day once I was done with the work that consumed me, I started losing it. To a point that I literally slept through the day. And then I forced myself to step out for a walk. This was after almost a week that I went for one. I wanted to do some 20K steps but after about the 5K mark, I was so tired that I had to sit down. I had almost given up. I did give up and took a rick back from Juhu. But once I reached Lokhandwala, did another 4K types to get the 10K in.

Damn stamina. Eventually managed 10K but took some superhuman effort and a couple of 30-min odd breaks. Which is ok. 10K is what matters. Let’s see if I get to do it today.

In other news, yesterday I had decided that I would fast for 2 days. I was ok till about 6 PM but since I was tired I gave in. Ate kachra – you know, packed snacks (chips, cookies, etc) and a dosa as thin as a tissue paper with masala inside as dense as people in a tiny Mumbai house. I had this intense craving for ice cream. That I avoided. Silver lining. So fast – no. OMAD – yes. Silver lining. Kuch to sahi hua.

I ate when I saw The Saint. And then I slept. At around 9ish. And thus, I was up at 5ish. Without an alarm!

Wait. Just glanced at the time. It’s 5:30.

All my life, I’ve wanted to be up at 4. Get to work at 5. Work till 9. And then chill. Alternatively, write till 9, and then get to work around 10. Irrespective. The point is that these 3ish hours in the morning are when I think I can do my best work. I should have been able to use the lockdown as an opportunity to change my schedule to include these morning golden hours as the time when I am active. Today’s a start. Let’s see if I can do this from tomorrow on. It all depends on when I go to sleep!

So, I also started the house hunt for a cheaper house. And I was appalled to know that rentals are still sky-high. All those talks of people migrating away from Mumbai and the realty market crashing? Hogwash. For a tiny 2-bedroom apartment beyond the middle of nowhere is asking for rent that something in the heart of Gurgaon would! I think if you have to live in / around Mumbai, you need to either accept that you would live in a place where you’d have to compromise things. Or you use saam, daam, dand, bhed, or whatever else to gather around a billion dollars and buy a house. There’s no other way.

Guess this is it for the rant of the day. It’s 5:50.

Lemme get to work.

Lemme see what I can do in the next 3 or so hours, where I would try to JUST work on the NFDC Scriptlab. The deadline’s Monday and I really want to send them something, even if the odds of getting thru are negligible. You know, I want to take shots that are beyond my reach.

So with that, over and out.

Oh, here’s streaks.

  • Morning Pages / Meditations – 153
  • #aPicADay – 0
  • 10K steps a day – 1
  • OMAD – 1
  • #noCoffee – 1
  • #noCoke – 65
  • 10 mins of meditation – 1
  • #book2 – 0
  • Killer Boogie – 0
  • Original Work (limited time only) – 0
  • Surya Namaskar – 0