150521 – Morning Pages

Yet another post where words did not flow and I had to struggle to get my thoughts in order.

5:10. I woke up a few minutes ago. The eyes are still groggy. Had some water. Trying to get over with the morning pages in about an hour and then, get to some real work.

So, COVID-19 took away yet another person I knew. This one did some work for me. I spoke to her almost every month. Worked more closely with one of my partners. While I haven’t met her ever, the sense of loss was something I couldn’t fathom. I don’t know when would this carnage stop.

When I heard about it, I was ok. I was like, “oh fuck” and got onto with my life. Attended a few calls, sent some emails, did more work. Etc. Etc. But during the day once I was done with the work that consumed me, I started losing it. To a point that I literally slept through the day. And then I forced myself to step out for a walk. This was after almost a week that I went for one. I wanted to do some 20K steps but after about the 5K mark, I was so tired that I had to sit down. I had almost given up. I did give up and took a rick back from Juhu. But once I reached Lokhandwala, did another 4K types to get the 10K in.

Damn stamina. Eventually managed 10K but took some superhuman effort and a couple of 30-min odd breaks. Which is ok. 10K is what matters. Let’s see if I get to do it today.

In other news, yesterday I had decided that I would fast for 2 days. I was ok till about 6 PM but since I was tired I gave in. Ate kachra – you know, packed snacks (chips, cookies, etc) and a dosa as thin as a tissue paper with masala inside as dense as people in a tiny Mumbai house. I had this intense craving for ice cream. That I avoided. Silver lining. So fast – no. OMAD – yes. Silver lining. Kuch to sahi hua.

I ate when I saw The Saint. And then I slept. At around 9ish. And thus, I was up at 5ish. Without an alarm!

Wait. Just glanced at the time. It’s 5:30.

All my life, I’ve wanted to be up at 4. Get to work at 5. Work till 9. And then chill. Alternatively, write till 9, and then get to work around 10. Irrespective. The point is that these 3ish hours in the morning are when I think I can do my best work. I should have been able to use the lockdown as an opportunity to change my schedule to include these morning golden hours as the time when I am active. Today’s a start. Let’s see if I can do this from tomorrow on. It all depends on when I go to sleep!

So, I also started the house hunt for a cheaper house. And I was appalled to know that rentals are still sky-high. All those talks of people migrating away from Mumbai and the realty market crashing? Hogwash. For a tiny 2-bedroom apartment beyond the middle of nowhere is asking for rent that something in the heart of Gurgaon would! I think if you have to live in / around Mumbai, you need to either accept that you would live in a place where you’d have to compromise things. Or you use saam, daam, dand, bhed, or whatever else to gather around a billion dollars and buy a house. There’s no other way.

Guess this is it for the rant of the day. It’s 5:50.

Lemme get to work.

Lemme see what I can do in the next 3 or so hours, where I would try to JUST work on the NFDC Scriptlab. The deadline’s Monday and I really want to send them something, even if the odds of getting thru are negligible. You know, I want to take shots that are beyond my reach.

So with that, over and out.

Oh, here’s streaks.

  • Morning Pages / Meditations – 153
  • #aPicADay – 0
  • 10K steps a day – 1
  • OMAD – 1
  • #noCoffee – 1
  • #noCoke – 65
  • 10 mins of meditation – 1
  • #book2 – 0
  • Killer Boogie – 0
  • Original Work (limited time only) – 0
  • Surya Namaskar – 0

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